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Open Poetry #9
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Untitled, Unclaimed
| Open Poetry #9 |
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Untitled, Unclaimed |
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ladysixstring Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374
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I want to write a poem and give it no name Untitled, unclaimed I want to say something but Im afraid to offend Where to begin You blame poverty Claim it robbed you of your precious dreams No way out, or so it seems Destiny yelds a stronger hand Or so it seems So it seems I want to write a song and give it no words Never sung, never heard I want to make you feel, but I'm afraid to create Feelings of hate You wear long sleeves To cover your heart, it's out there for all to see No hidden corners, no privacy Destiny yelds a stronger hand Or so it seems So it seems -jaimie www.ladysixstring.com |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jaimie D. Travis - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
This is absolutely awesome! Some great writing here! I loved it! Sauni Sauni :) Have you ever known the color grey when the nighttime finds you weak I have, I've walked that road each time; that's where my angel sleeps |
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Poetry Princess Junior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 28Des Moines, IA |
Words never heard are often never understood. what an awesome way of writting it without giving a reason or an answer to why. Great JOB! |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Sometimes whats left unsaid is more poignant than whats spoken...great write here. |
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ladysixstring Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 374 |
Saunni, Poetry Princess, Paula Finn... Thank you! -jaimie www.ladysixstring.com |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Hi ladysixstring, I believe this is my first visit to your place. I liked what I have read, and wait to see more. And, I'm glad that I stopped by. |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
Ah, a songstress in our midst.... well played... i could hear it |
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ggrn3 Member
since 2000-08-17
Posts 433Nahunta Georgia U.S. |
Ladysixstring Awesome as always. You want to "write a song and give it no words... Never sung, never heard." Beautiful. I've often found that Instrumental versions of a song often let you interpret your own words. Garfield |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
ladysixstring.... This really is a song.....may I plug in my synth and play along? Great writing!! Today is a gift.... That is why they call it 'the Present'! |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
fabulous! outstanding, miss musician lady... loved this!!  |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
this is the first of yours I have read, but it won't be the last I'm certain |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
I had a friend once in to substance abuse and he lost everything.....he blamed all around him and cried for pity and he always wore long sleeves to hide what was really his love....his damn track marks....I dont know why but your verse threw me back into this memory......I hope I didnt miss anything or carry it to a place of misgiving.... Beautiful words and lyrices???....yes.[This message has been edited by Mark Bohannan (edited 08-20-2000).] |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
I would have to agree with Mark on this one. . . break out that six-string and see what happens. . . you never know. . . Well done. . . just excellent. . . -------------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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