Open Poetry #6 |
The Adult Child |
BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
The little girl was standing there, looking so lost and alone When I took her hand she simply smiled, and asked me to take her home. Once there I asked her how she was, she looked so frightened and sad And as her eyes filled up with tears, she told me she felt bad. Everyone had left her, and no one even cared She was left to survive all by herself, Oh God she was so scared. As her life unfolded in front of me, the heaviness grew in my heart She needed much more than I could give, this kid was falling apart. So I gathered her into my open arms, and gently stroked her hair Rocking slowly back and forth, I told her I'd always be there. She held on a little tighter, but there was still no trust in her eyes For those she'd counted on before, had left without goodbyes. When she finally started talking, she struggled with what to say Afraid that she was bothering me, afraid... I'd walk away. I had to make her understand, that I wasn't going to let go So I sat her down beside me, and said what she needed to know. I told her she was the little me, and I knew her inside out I knew her fears and weaknesses, along with all her doubt. I told her I knew about the guilt, she'd carried around inside And all the heartache hurting her, and how hard I knew she'd tried. The more I talked, the deeper her stare, as she gazed into my eyes And I knew she was finally getting - some answers to all of her whys. So the door at long last was open, for both the child and I Now all that is left for us to do, is strengthen our new found ties. [This message has been edited by BSC (edited 02-08-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Bonnie Church - All Rights Reserved | |||
tori Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 520Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA |
Absolutely beautiful!!~ the story line was fantastic.. It flowed from start to finish.. Very well done Bravo! If with pen in hand I've made you think I've not wasted one drop of ink Vlh. visit my site~ http://www.hsanet.net/user/dkm/hellomy.htm |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
BSC, this did flow very nicely. The story was told beautifully. -SEA |
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Echo Rhayne Senior Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 1495Canyon Country, CA |
Oh so absolutely beautiful, and heart tearing and warming. Great job! Just be glad I'm not your child! *evil grin* |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Thanks so much for your kind replies, the kid inside helped..... |
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Lost Dreamer Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464Somewhere near the Rainbow |
This is beautiful. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
BSC... this is SO deeply touching...I read it and know this child and the tender soul of the person who wrote it...i understand. this is a beautiful moment you have shared. thank you, take care, janet marie ...there are places inside all our souls... that have never been touched... there are places inside our hearts... that need to be loved this much... Janet Marie *I miss you baby... I love you, always.* |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Thanks LostDreamer...didn't expect to see this out again....There's a kid in all of us, I was glad to find mine..... |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
BSC~ A gentle, loving piece. HUGS to 'adult'. HUGS to the 'child'. HUGS to YOU ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
BSC, a splendid account of the beginning footfalls along a healing path. An earnest "thank you" for this gifting. Claire |
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RufffRyder Member
since 2000-02-25
Posts 143<------Over There------> |
I can see that this took alot of soul searching to write. You have done an excellent job with your feelings here. This is one of few long one`s that have kept my attention all the way through. Thank you for the read BSC. [This message has been edited by RufffRyder (edited 02-26-2000).] |
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CrazyChick Member
since 2000-01-05
Posts 132 |
This is so beautiful, you did a great job!!! |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
very touching |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
I thank all of you for your kind words, I know it was kind of long, and I appreciate that all of you took the time to read it. |
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Very well written. A poem that keeps your attention by flowing smoothly, with interest, never seems long. |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent piece, tender and comforting! Well done! Denise |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Septsong and dsnyder - Thank you so much for your encouraging words, I'm grateful to you for reading it.... |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
This was a very loving and comforting poem. I really enjoyed it, Bonnie. Elizabeth I'm grabbing my hat and coat I'm leaving the cat a note Quick call me a ferry boat-getting out of town! |
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Gossamerwings Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 207 |
The kid inside of me that was never allowed to be,cried throughout this gentle and sweet read! This belongs in the book. I hope you will post it there! I must say that you are one of the best writers at passions! Gossamerwings ;) |
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Gossamerwings Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 207 |
BTTT with this!! Gossamerwings ;) |
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