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Open Poetry #6
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License to "Love" Me.....(title suggestions??)
| Open Poetry #6 |
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License to "Love" Me.....(title suggestions??) |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
.gif) When did the words "I Love You" Become a license for pain? How can you say "I Love You" And touch me opposite the grain? You speak the words "I love you" As you leave me in a heap You weave the words "I love you" While I cry myself to sleep You utter soft "I love you" While laughing at my life dreams You pronounce it "I love you" While you steal my self esteem Declaring proudly "I love you" While I hold in silent screams Revealing kindly "I love you" So nothing is as it seems This license to inflict pain Without guilt or harm to thee My lifes blood taken in vain Then the words come...you "Love" me .gif) Hold me for yesterday Kiss me for tomorrow But love me for today. [This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 04-07-2000).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
When did the words "I Love You" Become a license for pain? How can you say "I Love You" And touch me opposite the grain? ----------------- You utter soft "I love you" While laughing at my life dreams You pronounce it "I love you" While you steal my self esteem. ----------------- oh girl...a few Emails back...you said you were gonna write from a deeper place... your there my friend...your there. you know --I know -- we shouldnt know... this is excellent butterfly... and I gotta tell ya...the pic at the end...damn!! says it all... and all I need to say now is... Butterflies are meant to be free... and your words will let you fly. love ya, jm The stars shine so bright, now's the time I close my eyes - soft wind touch my face, Cool sand upon the place where I once kissed you And held you close. Now I will reach for the stars... Because Oh my love, that's where you are... Though the storms of black night rage on I still see your face I still feel your lips on mine And though my heart feels all alone without you I still hear you sing to me I still hear your voice on the sea... vertical horizon |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
ButterfliesDC~ You've set upon a new course. Fly !  ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
 Janet Marie and Marge** My own personal angels....you two know how to make me smile I've re-read this and the title...which is definately not my strong suit....it just doesn't Feel right...any suggestions would be quite welcomed. This was really difficult to write...it's hard to look so far inside...I guess I'm afraid that I'll fall in. But your words of encouragement have made it much easier to peek and be "pulled" back out. Thank you ladies Hold me for yesterday Kiss me for tomorrow But love me for today. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
I read it and I like it and I have lots of suggestions for a title...they are as follows...Not as it seems...License for pain...It doesn't feel right...Looking far inside...Falling In...Pulled back out...Silent screams....Need I go on.... Hope I didn't confuse you by offering so many..James |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
LOL...well confusion is a state of mind I'm used to so you made me feel quite at home....lol Thank you for reading and for your suggestions |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I'm BAAAAAACK LOL ya know...I dont think the title is so bad...it ties in perfect with the several times you use the word "license" in the poem...it seems the natural choice of words. I like it.Do you dislike it that much?  one that comes to mind...(that has nothing to do with the wording of the poem is)... "You cant pull the wings off this butterfly" or..."Butterlfy in a bottle" sorry..its too early to be thinking so hard...havent had my caffeine yet (smile) as for being afraid to look deep...always remember...we'll catch you if you "fall" take care SS love ya, jm The stars shine so bright, now's the time I close my eyes - soft wind touch my face, Cool sand upon the place where I once kissed you And held you close. Now I will reach for the stars... Because Oh my love, that's where you are... Though the storms of black night rage on I still see your face I still feel your lips on mine And though my heart feels all alone without you I still hear you sing to me I still hear your voice on the sea... vertical horizon |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
I can sadly relate to this one  |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Yep, I've been there too. Great poem, Butterflies! For a title I think I am partial to 'Silent Scream'. I think that sums up the feeling of this poem the best. Denise |
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TerryW Senior Member
since 2000-03-23
Posts 779Louisville, Mississippi, USA |
ButterfliesDC, This one is truly heartfelt. I, too, like Ruth, can relate to this one. And I often asked the same questions you did in my own mind. This is very good. Don't ever be afraid to write what you feel, because what you feel is your true power!  ~you reached inside, you touched my heart, and I am all the better for it~ Terry A. Woodson, Jr. |
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weaubleau Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 101MO |
sadly, i hear some of these same words from my bestfriend each and every day. this really touched my heart, and i'm sure it will touch hers. thank you so much. |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
J.M.* LOL SS i t's not that I hate it I just don't feel like it fits....and ya know I REALLY like Butterfly in a Bottle!!!! BUT.........lol I think I'll have to write something to go with it...that will be a first!! The title....then poem!! Thanks for being the "catcher"...butterfly catcher...lol Hoot* I'm so sorry  Denise* I think I'll throw them into a hat close my eyes and pick they have all sounded great, I just can't ever get the feel for the title, I'm going to have to send my poems to someone first and have them read and title them.......lol Thank you so much for reading!! Weaubleau* I see that you are new WELCOME!! and thank you for commenting. I'm sorry your best friend can relate to this...but hopefully she can find comfort in knowing that she is not alone as you can tell by me and by the replies. Once again Welcome to Passions! Hold me for yesterday Kiss me for tomorrow But love me for today. |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Butterflies, This was AWESOME!! I think everyone has pretty much summed up what I was going to say lol...but I gotta say this is GOOOOOD!! I am sorry that you can relate to this kind of pain and confusion. But you express it quite beautifully. I agree with the others...don't be afraid to look inside yourself. From what I have seen of you so far, you seem to be a lovely person to me with a loving heart and soul. Take care. AMY ~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~ |
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