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EagleScorpion
Senior Member

since 2000-03-08

Posts 1644
Here, Now, Forever

0 posted 2000-03-12 10:58 PM

Blue Eyes

There once was a man, like any other man,
On a snug midautumn's night,
His eyes were blue, a blue so true,
That reflected the moon's pale light.
There was something, Oh! something,
in this man's mind,
Something that drove him to shame,
Perhaps twas a death, or money miskept,
Or maybe a love untamed,
Yet I cannot say, In any concievable way,
Where this man may be,
He may be at sea, or beneath a grand tree,
but not in this country, probably,
I'm afraid that, Oh no! I just dont know,
What frame of time he's in,
It's just not clear, as to what exact year,
With a memory of mine so thin,
I also know not the friends he's got,
Nor do I know his name,
Nor do I know where he wants to go,
And perhaps he feels the same,
All things said, Alas! I know not,
But a few things I know are right,
He was a man, like any simple man,
On a true midautumn's night,
His eyes were blue, a sapphire blue!
And thats all my rememberance has led,
Oh, and that something, Oh! something,
In this man's thoughts,
that gave him a chilling dread,
And I cant, at last, rule out the fact,
That he might quite possibly be dead.

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite

since 2000-03-06

Posts 3733
Michigan

1 posted 2000-03-12 11:04 PM

Magnificent!!!!!! I loved this, I read it twice to be sure I hadn't missed anything

A refreshing walk with words that painted such a vivid picture. Thank you for posting!!

devina
Member Elite

since 1999-10-28

Posts 3539
Cali

2 posted 2000-03-12 11:14 PM

You've told quite a story with this one...breathtaking as it was!!!

Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...

Meadowmuse
Member Elite

since 1999-12-27

Posts 3263

3 posted 2000-03-12 11:22 PM

Imaginative and whimsical, EagleScorpion. This piece would be exceptional with just a few typo corrections and perhaps reconstructing into separate stanzas. Wonderful writing, nonetheless.

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

4 posted 2000-03-12 11:28 PM

EagleS~
This is mysteriously intriguing.
Where did he go? Got me to wondering.
You've served the purpose well.
I liked the way it flowed.
Made for a wonderful out-loud read.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

5 posted 2000-03-12 11:31 PM

Chilling! Well done!

Denise

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