Open Poetry #6 |
Procession |
suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
In the car that follows the big black hearse There is near silence, for the people converse In quiet whispers if they talk at all. For the coming gauntlet has cast a pall And there isn't much to say. Not a person wants to arrive at the place Where they'll share one last glimpse of a face That's forever imprinted upon their hearts But from which they'll now be apart Until their dying day. They know that their grief has merely begun But there's nowhere to hide and they cannot run. Cars pull off the road in a show of respect And tears of gratitude flow unchecked To drip off trembling chins. The destination is reached and the hearse stops And the heart of every passenger drops. Even adults need a comforting hand To help their shaking knees to stand As the funeral begins. |
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© Copyright 2000 suthern - All Rights Reserved | |||
Bbuzz Member
since 1999-12-17
Posts 76Washinton State |
I can relate, Suthern, having been to a funeral recently myself. All true what you say. Well written! Thank you. Bev |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
Not a nice thing to do But a nice poem you did suthern Remembered my Father and Mother all to well Very good poem so much emotions The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Suthern- Been there far too many times not to be moved by this one. Tastefully done. The imagery is almost too real and I'm transported back to tears of remembering. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
Not a nice subject, but beautifully written Suthern. I'd rather be anywhere than saying goodbye to a loved one. Well done Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen closely. ~Isis~ (Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Thank you all very much... this is one of those poems started many, many years ago when I was in that car... and was finished just last week when I pulled over for the passing of a funeral procession. I wasn't sure it worked... so your kind words are greatly appreciated! *S* |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Suthern, very heartfelt; saying good-bye is never easy and sometimes letting go never seems to happen because they stay in our hearts. Sad and beautiful.-SEA |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
It works, Suthern girl. You portray the feelings and emotions very well. Thank you. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I don't believe I've ever read anything about that time 'between'..very good..you found the emotions perfectly. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I can certainly understand that you couldn't finish this for awhile - but I'm glad you did - It's full of emotion - Nicely done, suthern.. |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Sadly enough I'll be at the funeral of someone close Tuesday, but this poem will be in my head. Thanks for sharing it Suthern. |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
You've captured the very essence of the experience Suthern... Sad and moving.... |
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tori Senior Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 520Mechanicsville, Maryland, USA |
Emotions very well captured southern..... ) If with pen in hand I've made you think I've not wasted one drop of ink Vlh. visit my site~ http://www.hsanet.net/user/dkm/hellomy.htm |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Suthern, A very difficult topic well written, and with grace Liz |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Yes, Suthern, this is beautifully done and very moving. Great piece of writing! Denise |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Does it work? It sure does suthern. You've grabbed every emotion and explained it so well. Great job <*\\\>< When you can't make up your mind Which way is right for you, Stop and softly ask yourself, What Would Jesus Do? |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Wow... thank you all very much! I'm overwhelmed... I know that I can always count on encouragement and support from some of you... but this has responses from people I thought never read my work! LOL. You are all very kind... thank you!!! Munda - you have my deepest sympathy and will be in my thoughts. [This message has been edited by suthern (edited 02-07-2000).] |
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Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
wow suthern, I can't believe how perfectly you portrayed such a sad scene....great writing girl *sybil ROFGMAO and eating those dang cookies again [This message has been edited by Iloveit (edited 02-07-2000).] |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Suthern, A difficult subject but well done. Enjoyed the read. *L* Sy |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
I saw everybit of this poem with incredible clarity...well done |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Belle - This well written poem hits a little too close to home for me. When I was in my early 20's, I was a Survivor Assistance Officer for widows of young men who died serving their country. More than once I was in that hearse, in my Uniform, ribbons intact, I'm sure a bitter reminder of why we shared that ride. Without the comfort of even a distant relationship to the widow and her husband's mother and father, in those darkest times of my life, what could I have said that could have helped? I still don't know the answer. I do know that every funeral procession that has passed by me since then has not gone by unnoticed and without regret or respect. It is truly the hardest of times. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
ROFL @ Iloveit's cookies... this poem needed a bit of levity, dear Sybil... thanks! *G* Seymour & Hoot: Many thanks for the read and the kind comments. LJA: Even nearest and dearest friends are at a loss for words... so I'm not surprised you were. You want to take the pain away and know you can't... and the helpless feeling is awful. I'm sorry this brought back painful memories... but after so many years, I welcomed the opportunity to write it and get rid of it! *S* |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Belle - and I'm glad you wrote it, too. This poem was quite lovely. |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Wonderfully descriptive poem on a universal subject! You took the reader right into that car with you. Corinne |
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jascanvey Member
since 1999-12-26
Posts 130England |
This was so tastefully done. I think we can all relate to it. You wrote it so well. I must admit I read the first lines and thought I would have to leave, but I'm glad I stayed to read it all. |
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Echo Rhayne Senior Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 1495Canyon Country, CA |
suthern, you words described this oh so well. As much as this happens I am surprised that many do not write about it, but you my dear, did an excellent job writing it, no matter how long it took you! Reading it brought me back to all the times I have been in that line myself, or have seen one. Its always heartbreaking either way! Just be glad I'm not your child! *evil grin* |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Well done Suthern.....as usual...but tell me something....what's more disheartening?...A hearse......or a cane truck? |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Thank you all very much!! *S* And Toe... that's easy... the misery of following a cane truck ends as soon as it turns... unless, of course, the frustration of following one puts me IN a hearse before that blessed event occurs! LOL |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Isn't it strange how words can evoke images or memories...when I read this last night, I was stunned at the images my mind recalled...of my own father's death...not particularly pleasant as it was sudden and he was only 57, the protocol that had to be followed and the lack of respect of fellow road users, they just tried to get between the hearse and the following procession...and even though I'm talking years ago, I've never been able to attend a funeral since, the funeral director's dropping my father down the stairs, crashing him through a window, my own memories of eating a chinese when he died, how could I?..I should have known...no tears allowed and hearing the scream as the curtains closed, looking round and realising it was me.. So well written Suthern, has dignity and immense emotion...it's the first time I looked back at the nightmares really and yes, you caught the sadness, well, you epitomised it.. HUSG< !signature--> The grape passes through the press to yield wine. Your life must pass through the press of passion and pain to yield the wine of wisdom.. [This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 02-08-2000).] |
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