Open Poetry #5 |
Last date with Autumn (I'm not sure whether I posted this before) |
Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
The thirsty stars lapped water out of puddles The crispy breeze roamed through the lonely streets I chewed my cotton candy, and the clouds Would disconnect into the tiny threads and bits The restless night leaned gently on my shoulders The streetlights shinned directly in my eyes But nothing passed my skin, my flesh, my fortress I walked without a care, like hypnotized So here we are and this, our final date together, Let’s make it seem eternal and unique And I shall wait for you, for worse and for the better Afraid to hear “good-bye,” we do not speak < !signature--> I fell in love and kept on falling [This message has been edited by Master (edited 01-27-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved | |||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Beautiful and sad And as always, a delight to read one of your pieces! Denise |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thank you Denise, and it's always a delight to read your comments! |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Well, if you did poest this one before, Master, I'm glad you did again, because I enjoyed it. Elizabeth "He have his goodness now. God forbid I take it from him!" -The Crucible |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thanks Elizabeth, I wrote this one a couple of months ago, but I like it a lot. |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
What a delightfully tender piece -- every line a poem in itself! Such imagery deserves another debut on the front page, my friend. --Kess Full fathom five thy father lies, Of his bones are coral made, Those are pearls that were his eyes; Nothing of him that doth fade But doth suffer a sea-change Into something rich and strange... --William Shakespeare, from The Tempest |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
(blushing) Oh! To be complimented by the greatest, it's trully an honor! [This message has been edited by Master (edited 01-27-2000).] |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Exellent Master! I love your wording, so unique and precise, as it is with all your works. Truly a sad thing to let go of autumn. I can relate, for it is my favorite season. Keep up the great work! *Krista Knutson* ~*Like a lion, without fear of the howling pack, Like a gust of wind, ne'er trapped in a snare, Like a lotus blossom, ne'er sprinkled by water, Let me, like a unicorn, in solitude roam.*~ Hymn Of Buddha |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I agree, master. This is written with just the right touch. Excellent work. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
This is an excellent piece of writing Master...one to be proud of I can live with the idea That we are merely actors Playing a part But I do wish Whoever is writing my script Would learn to use A few more Happy Endings ~Javan |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thank you everybody! Alwye, Fall is also my favorite season and one of my favorite topics to write about. Balladeer, thank you for your comments. And Ruth, I'm more proud to have people like you reading my work! |
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