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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia 
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And so my friend, the Hospice nurse has told you that it will all be over soon. And no doubt it will. Perhaps it already is at the time of this writing. You say to keep you in prayers. So much is happening it is unreal. This I know. So for today I kept you in my thoughts for six hours this morning. And for seven hours this evening. I send you all the energy and spirit that I have. The waiting is the hardest part though it seems. But that last breath will come, when he puts his head back against the pillow and inhales, then exhales, then, just doesn't. As you watch them in pain you hope it comes. And with each breath you're glad it didn't. But, it will come. With it will come new energy. As you've been struggling to just stay awake and for personal comfort and think your body can't go any further -- when that time comes it will be like you just woke up. There will be lots of things to do. Do them. Get involved in them. There will be time to cry later. You'll look inside yourself too. And ask questions. What does life mean? What does death mean? When it was my time to be in your shoes I remember those well. I wish I had the answers to give you -- but you'll have to find them yourself. I can only offer some of the fuel that took me on my own path. When my father invited the black congregation to come to worship with us one Sunday morning the pastor of their church got up to speak with the biggest smile on his face. He was so happy to be there. I still remember what he said that morning. "One day You're going to die. One day You're going to die And they will dig a hole In the ground And they will Put you in it. One day You're going to die. And they will dig a hole In the ground And they will Put you in it And then they will Go back down To the fellowship hall And eat potato salad. And they are Going to talk about You They are going to Talk about you. What they gonna say? When you were born You cried Everybody else Was happy. When you were born You cried Everybody else Was happy. When you die Is it gonna be The other way around?" Now you can look around at the people that are gathered at those hospital beds and you can tell what kind of life your loved ones have lived. I don't know anything about the details of their lives except that they gave you to the world and you -- you're a good person. That says enough to me. I know that you're close to them -- and that maybe sometimes you weren't. Things you regret. Things they may have done that hurt your feelings -- I just don't know -- can't know. But, you're a Christian person and there are some words that everyone can draw on for power from Paul's letter to the Romans quote: Whether we're agnostics, or Christians, Jews or Buddhists, Hindus or Moslems, we can find strength in the power that love has to cross all boundaries -- even to the places we can't go -- even from people we may have never met. And with the power of that love we can transform lives and say as Paul said 'I have fought the good fight, I have finished my course.' As you ask those questions remember this is where the real power is -- not in petty judgments and recrimination over sins of weakness -- sins of life. Who cares about that stuff? Let the Bible thumpers have it. To look around the room and say 'these are the people that loved him' -- that's the final judgment. I have the little black notebook that belonged to my father. That he wrote in. It contains some of his thoughts on dying and death -- he put his funeral sermons in it. He always ended with this poem: quote: Namaste Peace and energy to you. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Reb, this so...you have managed to make sense on a subject that has never made sense to me. For that I thank you. Peace to you, and peace to your friend. |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Those who have lived through another's death can understand what you are feeling, and those that haven't will be touched by your words. M |
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Carolina Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 224Myrtle Beach, SC |
Two weeks ago this morning, they told my Uncle that he would have only six months to live. He passed away last night at 7:00. My Grandmother was sitting beside him, as he started the "death rattle" that she's heard so many times before. She called the family into the room, and as they were coming in, the phone rang. It was the Hospice nurse, calling to check up on things. (She had started calling instead of staying because she saw all of the family around and all of the loving care that was given to him each and every moment of the day and night.) She arrived 5 minutes later, checked on him, and quietly closed the bedroom door behind her, leaving my family to be with him. We gathered hands and made a circle around his bed, and started a prayer of thanksgiving, a prayer of peace and love for my Uncle. With each breath he struggled to take, we continued with prayer, each person took turns, one by one, praying. On the last prayer, from the last person, just before everyone said Amen...we heard him take his last breath. Our circle of family got smaller, but in our faith and love, it became stronger. He will be cremated, we'll have a short memorial service, and we will all go to the beach, spread half of his ashes off the Cherry Grove pier, and the other half will be spread over the Waccamaw River. How fitting your poem was, LR. We know he was met by alot of family and friends as he joined our Lord in heaven. Your words have always brought me comfort and strength, and I will always be thankful that God sent me a beautiful and caring friend to be here for me when I need him. Thank you, LR [This message has been edited by Carolina (07-31-2003 03:20 PM).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Holding thoughts with you. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Carolina~ May His power of comfort be with you all in this time of need~ Reb~ This is, without doubt, the most touching piece I've ever read here~ He has blessed you with the words-of-comfort for another~ I am keeping this piece ... for it contains so much compassion and 'understanding'~ Sincerely~ ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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quatro Member
since 2003-04-29
Posts 392Galveston, Texas |
Reb, I respond to your post with tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat. You have udoubtably touched the very core of what we all want to know. I have not posted much here in a while but I come by and visit every day and I read and sometimes respond. I have been going through my own journey and am preparing myself for surgery on the 19th of this month. Although my surgery is routine, it is still a major surgery and I have children at home to care for. I am scared, but have faith that all will go well. Your words have somehow comforted me in a way I can't explain. There is very little chance that anything major will go wrong during my surgery, but for that slim chance I am comforted in knowing that there will be someone on the other side shouting "Here she comes!" Thank you quatro |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Reb...No Toerag comments this time....this is superb my friend....Just superb... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Rebel....I'm adding this to my library. Your words here mean a great deal to me, and for that I thank you. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Reb..Thank you. |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Thank you for this beauty, your words are incredible. as always Mushy Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
While I began reading with mind upon the petty things of life...I ended with revelations of what is important. My friend, you have guided my thinking into a new direction today. I shall save this, and when I slip (and I will slip for I know me) I will refer to these words. Patricia |
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Trillium
since 2001-03-09
Posts 12098Idaho, USA |
This is so moving and answers many needs! God must have given you guidance in writing this wonderful piece! Thanks for sharing. Betty Lou Hebert |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Huggzzzz, my friend. This is not just one of the best things you've ever written... it's one of the best I've read. luv ya... Auntie |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Reb, you may never know how many people you will touch with this. It touched me deeply and I thank you for the planting of this seed. May it reap a harvest beyond your reckoning. Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Thank you for sharing this. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Local Rebel Life is nebulous, thankyou for the post. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
there she goes....here she comes.. That sums it up very nicely. I've always felt there was something wrong with the system somewhere when that's what we all have to look forward to...one can hope it's a beginning and not an end.. powerful writing. reb...  |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
very touching...very deep... there is something worth hearing, knowing, feeling, in every line of this...It makes me think of my Grandfather -- when he was dying, I'd give anything if someone had sent these words to me...There's someone out there who has a very good friend in you.. Thank you for sharing.. hugs, g |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
"There, She's Gone" Henry Van Dyke  found at this web addy http://vicky.com/quotes/death.htm enjoyed.. g I want to run naked in the Blue! [This message has been edited by dgvarner (08-01-2003 09:57 PM).] |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I'm shaking now, in a strange calmness death and dying...thoughts that have been on my mind lately...and I am soothed by your words...greatly and gratefully |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
quote: namaste, I hope, and safe journey a powerful moving piece, soulfriend your heartbeat was heard, your warmth was felt |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
Carolina  |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
To all; It was a judgement call to place this here -- it started out as a private message to Carolina -- but I thought there might be some reciprocal benefit of community. Certainly it is a subject that faces us all. If there is an essense here that some can take comfort in then my judgement was sound -- but -- I hope you take away from this whatever truth you find inherent here and forget the messenger that brought them. There is always a thin line to walk between the proffer of counsel and self-agrandizement. If I ever thought anybody would pay attention to the things I wrote I would have chosen the pen name Anonymous. dg; the miracles of the internet eh? with what little bit of forensic analysis I can conduct on my father's notebook his copy that he typed himself has been in there circa 1952 -59. In all that time it only ever said Author Unknown. I know that Abigail Van Buren went in search of the author one time and as I recall the search wasn't conclusive. I'm glad that it touched a spark strong enough that you wanted to take the time to browse around and get back to us here with it. I want to extend my thanks and apologies to Ron and the moderators -- may have been a borderline case since this post is full of other people's words -- I thought the wind of edification might be the right breeze for bending the rules a tad toerag you keep on making those toe comments -- humor is a powerful salve -- that's why the world loved Bob Hope -- why the ladies love you when my father was in the last days and the last of his children finally made it in he had us all lined up around the room and in one of his final cogent moments gave us each our final orders one by one -- and said he was ready to go then he laid back and closed his eyes the room fell silent for a breif eternity -- then -- he sat back up and said 'nothing happened' mel brooks couldn't have produced a better comedy |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
If it will help any doubts you might have had about posting... I'm back to put this into my library... for I know these are words I'll want to read again... and I know there will be times I need to read them... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
just needed this again today |
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Carolina Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 224Myrtle Beach, SC |
I hope your friend does fine, passing shadows. I'll remember him in my prayers, and you, too. I had to print this, because it has so much comfort in it, and it seems to answer alot of the questions I have. |
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PhaerieChild Senior Member
since 1999-08-30
Posts 1787Aloha, Oregon |
"There she goes"........my heart and soul cried. "Here she comes"........my heart and soul rejoiced. What a wonderful perspective! Very touching and is now a favorite to add to my library. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Reb, I want to thank you for posting this....for the words and meaning and comfort of those words....for showing your heart, care, and compassion.... and for being such a good friend to your friend. From all the words in the heartfelt replies here, you have touched a lot of hearts. I know that you certainly touched mine. Thank you so very much, Reb. Carolina should be honored to have such a friend as you....I can tell that she is. I'm also going to keep this so that I can read it again as I need to. There are times I wish I would have had something so precious to read. Heart hugs to you, Reb  Ethel |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
Ruth; no, no doubts about posting it -- just want to make sure that it isn't about me -- read, re-read, direct others -- if there is a truth here to be lived then it should be. Dixie; come back anytime!Carolina; you too!PhaerieChild; glad this perspective offers meaning... Ethel; you're welcome backatcha |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
library bound...thank you for sharing your thoughts |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Reb, I'm glad this came back up to the top. You are a treasure, my friend. This proved it for sure.  Hugs Ethel |
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