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Facing the truth this week |
Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
This week, I have a CT scan on Monday and then I get to discuss it with my oncologist on Wednesday and I am very frightened. When I finished the radiation treatments on May 2, I felt tired but very upbeat. I was so sure that the tumor was totally gone. My energy has now returned and I am still somewhat upbeat, but I am very scared to know if maybe even a tiny piece of it might still be there because it is a very aggressive cancer. Right now, I still think its all gone.....and don't even want to hear that it isn't. The scary thing is...that ever since I've had this horrible disease, I have never ever gotten one shred of good news, but I have kept fighting and intending to win. I am really afraid of Wednesday, so I was wondering if any of you would be so kind as to please include me in your prayers. I will do my best to keep you informed on what is going on, but if its bad news, I may be so depressed that I might not be able to face it for a couple of days....but I really will try to sit down at this computer and let you all know something, or at least email one of you so you can spread the news. Thanks for all of your love and prayers. ~ superloving hugs Lyra |
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© Copyright 2002 Lyra Nesius - All Rights Reserved | |||
Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
You'll be in my prayers Lyra. (((((HUGS))))) God bless. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
You being in my prayers is a "given" Lyra. Of course you are scared, and it's good to talk about it so keep sharing, and we will all be right here with you t help as bst as we can. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
No matter what, you will be in my prayers. Remember that whatever happens, you are an inspiration to a lot of people here - your spirit shines in your poetry! Please let us know in some way.... |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Healing and comforting prayers coming your way Lyra. *they never stopped.....* [This message has been edited by Enchantress (05-31-2002 07:20 PM).] |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
Lyra, Please know that you will be prayed for by my family in Boston. We will be with you spiritually and will be thinking extra good thoughts. May God grant you His peace in your heart and may His healing powers wash over you and remain with you. You do not walk alone. Hugs, Marti " My wrinkles are badges of courage and reveal that I am a Mother." |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Huggles...you're in my thoughts... K |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Mashed potatoe hugs, Lyra...you know where I am if you just want to vent, okay? OK! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Lyra You are in my thoughts and prayers, every day and all the time. I sure don't blame you for being scared...I know I would be. I hope you can make peace with time until Wednesday...it is so slow and yet so fast! Prayerful hugs! |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
You know, you have overcome so much, and you will get through this next hurdle fine, I feel sure. Prayers are with you, nightly. Sandra |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Super-loving hugs to you, dear lady...You're the best - I believe you'll be fine.. |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
Dear Chipmunk, I'm not religious, but for you I'll say a prayer in me own way. Hang in there pal, I think the whole blue pages is keeping you in their thoughts coming Wednesday. I will and I'll keep my fingers crossed. Ya know, these tons of burden on your shoulders? Just know that we all be here to help you carry it sweet girl. Titia A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess... |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(tears fall down my cheeks) Oh Lyra, my prayers are with you as they always are, sweet friend, I send many angels to guide you with strength during this tough time and during the check-up! (sad sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, you are in my thoughts and prayers! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Munda...for the prayers all the way from the Netherlands.... Are they coming by boat, plane or online LOL Thanks so much... ~ many thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Sharon...I know that you have been praying for me all along...and I really appreciate that more than you can ever know. ~ Big fat loving hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much for saying that, PDV....I like being an inspiration for others... ~many many sweet thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Nancy... I know I will be okay...how can I not be okay when I have prayers coming from so many different countries and from all of my loving friends here....but, of course...I am still scared and worried, so I am very appreciative that you have been praying for me. ~many loving thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much, Marti... Please tell your family that I say thank you also....I am a very scared chipmunk right now. ~ Many many sweet thank you hugs to you and your family Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much for the sweet huggles, Severn.....Wow...all the way from New Zealand.....I think God will be very impressed. ~ Big fat thank you hugs from the northern hemisphere.....Michigan, U.S.A. Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much for your prayers and your offer to talk, Karilea....and of course for the mashed potatoe hugs....I just had some of those with dinner...they were delicious... ~ loving thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much for your prayers and thoughts, Martie....and you really know exactly how to write my feelings.... so fast and so slow. You hit the nail right on the head. ~loving thank you hugs from Michigan Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much for your vote of confidence, Sandra...I hope you are right, but I would like to make it through this without major radical surgery....I wonder if that is asking too much? I hope that you have been feeling better. ~ feel better to you and thank you from me hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much, Nan, for all of your caring....and also for that outlandishly wonderful compliment..... ~ thank you hugs from my heart Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much, Titia...I am not religious either...in the go to synagogue or go to church sense of the word....but I do believe in God and I believe that he/she hears our prayers...and I feel very fortunate to have prayers and thoughts from all of my friends here at Passions.... With all of these prayers coming from all over the world...I think God will be impressed...don't you. ~ loving thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much, Noah for all of your prayers and your understanding... You...truly are an angel. ~ human thank you hugs to an angel Lyra |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Lyra, my thoughts and prayers are with you always. We will always be here for you. I send you lots of Big Hugs. |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Lyra sweetie, you KNOW you’ll be in my prayers. I am praying and crossing my fingers, and hoping like crazy, that you will get good news. With all of us praying so hard, God simply HAS to hear, I’m sure of it. Big hugs for Wednesday. Everything is possible in the game of life |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
We will all be with you, heart and soul, and you will have many arms reaching out to hold you close. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Sue...for your big hugs, thoughts and prayers... I will try to call you sometime soon...but I have been really busy these past couple of days, trying to get a lot of stuff, including poetry, done before the "axe falls" and chops my life off. ~ thanking you ever so much hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Tracey...I certainly appreciate all of your prayers and thoughts and also the big hugs... I really need all of that stuff quite badly right now.... I am very SCARED!!!!! ~ great big thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much, Kacy...It is so nice to have all of my friends here as a safety net, because I feel so vulnerable right now...and I feel as if my psychological safety net has a big rip in it....because of the uncertainty I am facing... ~ thanks for the safety net hugs Lyra |
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Muys Member
since 2002-04-06
Posts 389The Netherlands |
Dear Lyra I pray to God for you and I hope He will be listen and send you the good news much love Muys |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
thinking of you....praying for you..... Lauren~ I would rather have one breath of his hair, |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much for your prayers, Muys... I really appreciate them and I think that God will be very impressed that I have prayers coming for me to Him/Her from all over the world. ~great big thank you hugs Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thank you so much, Lauren...I am so very scared about tomorrow... I really appreciate all of these prayers from my friends here. ~ Great big hugs of thanks Lyra |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Been here all along, just quietly. But it's Wednesday so I thought I'd say Hi, I'm thinkin' about ya, and praying. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Duncan.... I need all of the prayers I can get right now.....and I certainly appreciate yours.... ~ big thank you hugs Lyra |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
No red flags yet, my dear...and I would tell you if I felt them...and my feelings, of late, have been pretty much on target. You remain in my prayers, just because you have been such a little chipmunk... |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Karilea....I really appreciate your prayers and sure hope that your intuition is still on target..... My intuition says everything is okay...but my intuition sometimes needs repair, so I'm not sure whether I trust it. ~ GREAT BIG thank you huggggssss!!!! Lyra |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Lyra, Stress really sucks and depression is worse. And I'm almost certain they aren't good for you. So I'm prescribing a huge dose of love, support and friendship. I'll donate all I've got! Peace. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Hoping and praying for good news... and wishing you peace as you wait. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Thinking of you.... |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Don't forget I pack my phone with me where ever I am and I am thinking of you today. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Lyra, I'm right beside you holding your hand... |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
My thoughts and prayers are with you today, Lyra.... God bless America, my home sweet home. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Another prayer added....please keep us posted Lyra. |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
i'm right there beside you...... |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Lyra, thinking of you, hoping things went well today. Sandra |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Holding tight, little one... |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Dear Everyone.....I finally got a chance to sit down at my computer. I have been on the phone with various family members all night....everyone wanted to know how today went. Well........I have great news. Everything looks all clear in the scan, and my urologist did a cystoscopy and she probed around my bladder a lot....she kept apologizing for hurting me and I kept thinking about how much less this hurt than the radiation burns did....so, I told her that I didn't care how much she hurt me...as long as she gave me good news.... When she said that she couldn't find any trace of the tumor....I just instinctively said "Oh I love you". But she wants to do a biopsy and scrape the walls of my bladder, just to make sure there is nothing left. We haven't got that scheduled yet...but it will probably be within the next 3 weeks. She also wants to take my bladder out even if there is no sign of cancer because it has a hight recurrence rate.......I told her that I wouldn't do that unless the cancer was very clearly there. I think that quality of life is more important than length of life. Larry, Nancy, PDV, Suthern, Elizabeth, Doreen, Sandra and Karilea.....I noticed that all of you have left replies here for me today.....and because its so late...I hope that you don't mind if I thank you all together instead of individually this time. I honestly think that the cancer was killed not just by the radiation, but also by my visualizations, my attitude and especially by all of your wonderful prayers...... Thank you all so much........ ~ sweet loving thank you hugs to all Lyra |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I don't care WHERE you leave the notes, little one...just as long as they contain words like these.... I don't want to say I told you so...so I'll shut up now...LOL...and I shall go to bed very, very happy.... |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Oh Lyra, that is such great news!!! I just NEW that with all of us praying for you…that God would hear and make everything okay. I know it’s not completely over yet…but I am just grinning from ear to ear for you!!! I am SO HAPPY that you got good news today. I shall drink a toast to your long and healthy life!!! Big warm hugs |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Lyra, I have been thinking about you all day long, today. I hope everything was good, today. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Karilea...my dear friend from Kansas...you can say "I told you so" as much as you want... Right now...I am walking on air. I talked to so many people tonight that I have laryngitis...LOL Tracey...I agree, I know it was the prayers...I think God was probably so impressed with all of the love and prayers and thoughts sent to me here, that He/She performed a miracle for me....so far...anyway, but I don't think there will be anything in that biopsy...I will be surprised if there is. Lyra |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks Sue...Yes it was!!!! It was very good, everything is clear...but I still have to have a biopsy to confirm it.... I don't think there will be any cancer in that biopsy...at least I hope not. ~ ear to ear grin... Lyra |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
This is wonderful, wonderful news. |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks Sue :thumbs up: ~ HUGS!!!! Lyra |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
quote: i am elated!!!! i am sooooooo happy to hear this news!!! we become what we think..... this is a vital lesson.... thank you, Lyra, for sharing this beautiful news with us....... i am smiling .... there are stars in my eyes glistened with tears of joy....... |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Thanks so much, Doreen.... There are stars in my eyes too...but there is laryngitis in my throat from talking so much today.......and also from catching David's cold. I guess that was a congratulatory gift to me. ~ stars in the eyes hugs Lyra |
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