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Critical Analysis #2
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'Round
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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'Round |
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paperthin New Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 6 |
Talk the night o'er long light lis'ning, Feel it lick away your languish Whilst trying not let time turn 'round. See the starlight seeping slowly, Watch it soft and drain so sweetly Whilst trying not let time turn 'round. Let your mind take tickled tremors, Live the tragic passion thriving Whilst trying not let time turn 'round. Talk the days sun shining stealthy, Feel it subdue your unclad spine Whilst knowing time turns 'round and 'round. |
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| © Copyright 2007 paperthin - All Rights Reserved | |||
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
Talk the night o'er long light lis'ning, Feel it lick away your languish Whilst trying not [to] let time turn 'round. See the starlight seeping slowly, Watch it soft and drain so sweetly Whilst trying not [to] let time turn 'round. Let your mind take tickled tremors,(of what? Live the tragic passion thriving (how do you live tragic passion? Whilst trying not [to] let time turn 'round. Talk [of] the days [of] sun shining stealthy, Feel it subdue your unclad spine(how can it subdue a unclad spine? Whilst knowing time turns 'round and 'round. I do like the first two stanzas because they are clear and have pretty good imagery and are understandable but the other two stanzas don't explain all that well. |
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TyroStar Junior Member
since 2007-01-31
Posts 38 |
I do not like how you used words like o'er, and lis'ning. I think it takes away from the meaning of the poem for the modern reader. Poetry was written as such in the past, when poetry was at it's best, true. But that's just the language of that time. When people look back at the poetry way back in the 2000's, the wording would obviously be different than that of earlier times. Other than that, I think this is beautifully written. Good work. (: |
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