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Cold Hearted
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Cold Hearted |
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caterina Member
since 2002-07-25
Posts 188Canada |
She said "noisy wildlife," I figured it was a joke. It is a joke, right, Lydia? No, well I pity you, your miserable existence, the sounds of nature lost to your concrete soul. You should feel lucky that you even hear them in this day and age. A war has been waged on wildlife, Lydia, it's called development. Every night I open my windows to hear the lullaby of frogs and toads, we might not live in a swamp, but we are on their turf, they were here first and I bet they'd like to see you croak. In fact, you're a bigger nuisance to them than they are to you. Soon, these sounds may be gone, then what will you say, Lydia, "Where's the wildlife, it's so quiet?" caterina |
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| © Copyright 2002 Carol Jane Bleichert - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Radrook Senior Member
since 2002-08-09
Posts 648 |
Cold Hearted She said, "Noisy wildlife." I figured it was a joke. It was a joke, right, Lydia? No? Well, I pity your miserable existence -- the sounds of nature lost to your concrete soul. You should feel lucky that you even hear them in this day and age. A war has been waged on wildlife, Lydia, it is called development. Every night I open windows to hear the lullaby of frogs and toads. We might not live in a swamp but we are on their turf Lydia. They were here first and I bet they'd like to see us croak. In fact, we are a bigger nuisance to them than they are to us. Soon, these sounds may be gone Lydia. Then what will you say? "Where is the wildlife? It is too quiet?" caterina Comments: Good theme! Nice dialogue scenario kept me interested throughout! I wondered a bit about whether the hyperbolic: "I pity your miserable existence." is warranted. It gave me reason to pause and ponder. BTW Modifications are just my opinion. Thanks for sharing! God bless! |
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Kirk T Walker Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 357Liberty, MO |
I agree that this is a nice dialogue, and it has a nice message. At times, perhaps, it's a little on the didactc side. I think I'd lose the pun "croak" because it brings humor into the third stanza and kind of changed my expectation of the ending so that I was expecting a punchline type ending. I think with some work, though, that this could be a very nice piece. Disclaimer: The preceding statement is just my opinion. |
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