The Corner Pub |
Cigarette |
Strosek Member
since 2000-04-08
Posts 61Fourways, Gauteng, South Africa |
Flame strikes against its cold white cover Brownish centre slowly turning red Flame fades as its necessity is over Grey smoke twirls, Grey ash is shed Inhale, then breathe deep Grey smoke fills your kingdom Exhale, the smoke returns Mouth and nose, vents of freedom Resting between your fingers It’s own life growing short Grey smoke devours as its life lingers Ash consumes where heat once fought Smoke gently dances as it rises to the sky Three or four of them twirling in delight Slowly they go there own way, as the cry Smoke gone, the dancers have taken flight Red light lingers, burning its soul Ash forms to protect what is still strong Ash falls, heat continues to take its toll Life gone, ash has fallen, red light is gone Lifeless stub rests between my fingertips Flicked away, forgotten, another pulled from a box. May the light of day always shine during the darkest of nights. |
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© Copyright 2000 Victor Tunmer - All Rights Reserved | |||
PrincessPoet Member
since 2000-04-15
Posts 133Long Beach, Calif. |
I dislike cigarettes, ugh But, there is good detail in this poem. Your failures in life come from not realizing your nearness to success when you give up. -Yoruba Proverb Poetry & Friendship, PrincessPoet |
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Lost Dreamer Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464Somewhere near the Rainbow |
Interesting poem, I also find cigarettes repulsive, but your writing is very good on the life of one. |
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Strosek Member
since 2000-04-08
Posts 61Fourways, Gauteng, South Africa |
princessPoet/ Lost Dreamer : thanks for the replies. umm, this poem was acctually written at a time in my life before I stated to smoke, I went through a very dark period in my life, and it was a Synonym on how life destroys the human soul. May the light of day always shine during the darkest of nights. |
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Lost Dreamer Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464Somewhere near the Rainbow |
I stand corrected, and appreciate your poem even more, it's an excellent analysis to the destructiveness, thanks for sharing it here with us, and I am glad that dark period is past you. |
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ESP Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556Floating gently on a cloud.... |
This is an excellent poem....great synonym and so well written! Love and hugs, Lizzie "Poetry is the true expression of my soul, it is my ultimate means of communication. It is my rainbow of delight." |
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blackhalo Member
since 2000-02-15
Posts 467Denver, CO |
Ciggarettes tend to make life seem better at times, (yes I smoke), but ultimatly they break up what mutual friendships I have. Everyone but me seems to be quitting! No, not really! Excellent comparison, and I believe I completely understand. (for once, LOL!) I think though, that I am going to quit sometime soon, I just am not quite ready to give up my 15 minute smoke breaks every day! LOL! Sorry, I tend to ramble a lot! Hope, Alicia A. Renzelman |
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