The Corner Pub |
My Soon and Sudden Departure (pantoum?) |
Dennis L. White Senior Member
since 2000-02-17
Posts 1463Michigan, U.S.A. |
My soon and sudden departure What might be a mystery for some Many may think, but aren't sure Why this day has come What might be a mystery for some A revelation will be known Why this day has come The veil lifted, a light shone A revelation will be known This quandary will be past The veil lifted, a light shone The answer will new questions cast This quandary will be past Will the answer satisfy The answer will new questions cast The reason I had to die Will the answer satisfy Will it seem wrong or right The reason I had to die Did justice thus expedite Will it seem wrong or right Many may think, but aren't sure Did justice thus expedite My soon and sudden departure |
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© Copyright 2000 Dennis L. White - All Rights Reserved | |||
Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
I think these are very clever. Your character seems in need of a stay of execution, or a good lawyer. This style allows you to reveal just enough, but not too much. Interesting...good writing. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Dennis, your exploration into different poetic styles is producing some very good writing. Keep it up! |
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Swåmp¤Faerÿie Member
since 2000-03-29
Posts 358Illinois |
Dennis!! Another great tale!! How good you are with words!! I really enjoyed this poem,the words you used were so interesting!! great work!! swampola And there she weaves by night and day, a magic web of colours gay.~Tennyson |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA |
Dennis; Very mysterious and scary! The poem is magnificently written, but it reads like a death wish, and you're usually so positive. I guess I'm not familiar with the style, I'll have to look this one up. You certainly are talented and versatile. Thanks for sharing your wonderful gift for writng. Ellie 02 |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
very interesting...i like this one dennis..you did a great job! dg "A Poet's life is on written page; a scenario to take the stage--watch..." dgvarner |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA |
Dear Dennis; Now I see! WOW! This is a multi layered wonder. It reads more like a murder mystery now. How very clever of you. Thanks, Dennis, for clearing this "little mystery" up for me. I wish that I had read it more carefully the first time, sorry for that, bro. Ellie D):^} 02 |
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Alle'cram Senior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 1816Texas |
Dennis, I love how you shed light on Jesus, "The veil lifted, a light shone"! Wow! Powerful. |
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