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Holiday Tanka
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Holiday Tanka |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida 
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Lights twinkle brightly shining from icy blue spheres upon sight of presents Best gifts are small packages – The smile of a child May I never be too busy to help another's load, Then I'll be drinking from the saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed. --Author Unknown |
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| © Copyright 1999 Nicole Williams - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This is lovely, Satiate - and it's wonderful to see your smiling face(s)....  |
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Alicat Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094Coastal Texas |
Wonderful adherance to format, with a truly simplistic message. Truly, the best gift one could ever hope for would be the smile of a child. Alicat As I sit here dimly thinking Watching modem lights a-blinking Churning out poetic hash. Lord, in all Your piety, Help me keep my sanity: Please don't let the modem crash! --Alicat |
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Beki Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1569Newport Beach, CA, USA |
Thius is beautiful but doesn't quite fit the form...5-7-5-7-7...simple rewriting will remedy that if you are so inclined. The image is perfect for the for, and you've captured it very well. Consider Lights twinkle brightly shining from icy blue spheres when presents sighted- Best gifts are small packages – The joyful smile of a child [This message has been edited by Beki (edited 12-08-1999).] |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
Thanks all And thank you, Beki. I must have misread the format for a Tanka...I thought it was 5-7-5-7-5!  Your constructive suggestions are much appreciated. May I never be too busy to help another's load, Then I'll be drinking from the saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed. --Author Unknown |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
What a sweet poem! So much imagery packed into this one! |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Beautiful, Satiate! Very nice! Denise |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
This is Lovely Satiate A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire! |
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Ladycat 
since 1999-07-05
Posts 782At the edge and a doorway,TX |
Is it too late for me to tell you how the image(s) are beautiful and how I can't wait to see that too.. Love, Lady |
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