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Allstaria22
Member

since 2000-06-11

Posts 83
MN USA

0 posted 2002-09-11 08:08 PM

I've never been happier in my life
yet sometimes at night
I wake up crying
the pain of the past still
haunts me
still lurks in the shadows
It's been years
since I saw my fathers face
since I even heard his voice
I thought I was over that
that I had finally let go
but the memories flood my dreams
and over and over I hear his words
of how he can not love me
unless I change myself to suit him
but I couldnt then
and I sure as hell wont now
but I long for that relationship
that I was denied most of my life
and now that I have a husband
and a want to start a family with him
all I can do is long
and wonder if I will be like him
will I destroy my children
like he once destroyed me?
the voice inside me
tells me I am nothing like him
and I pray everyday to God
my true and loving Father
that He will protect me from myself
and help me to learn that I am not him
that I am stronger than that
my love for my husband is stronger than that
and God's love for me is stronger
than anything.

Isaiah 1:18

"Everybody loves a rose, will you be thankful for the thorns?" -All Together Seperate

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

1 posted 2002-09-11 09:41 PM

(big hugggssssss) Oh Dana, I am so sorry you never got to know your father so well, sweet friend, my heart goes out to you and your tears and yes, may you only grow stronger and love your loved ones just as He will always love you so much, God Bless You, we all love youn so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Dana, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

miriam
Member

since 1999-08-26

Posts 323
glendale,ca.

2 posted 2002-09-13 05:10 PM

As you start your own family, you will realize that you had nothing to be scared about. Put your family in the hands of the Lord...remember that "A family that prays together, stays together"

miriam coronado

Joyce Johnson

Member Rara Avis

since 2001-03-10

Posts 9912
Washington State

3 posted 2002-09-13 07:28 PM

No indeed you aren't like him. Your tenderness shows, and once you hold those little mites, you'll truly know how to love. Joye

sunrise2227
Junior Member

since 2002-09-13

Posts 13
Ohio, USA, Keep the Faith

4 posted 2002-09-14 05:16 PM

Your beauty lies within; you must believe in
yourself, take one day at a time, and your
children will truly be a gift from God.  You
show much compassion and the desire to be a
good mother.  Put your faith in God and you
will succeed!  Thanks for sharing such a touching poem!

Donna-Maria Jones

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