»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #4
»
New Year's Humor
| Open Poetry #4 |
|
New Year's Humor |
|
|
RSEvans Senior Member
since 1999-10-23
Posts 1147Tulsa, OK, USA 
|
####Received this from my nephew and thought you all might find it amusing...!!!###### Subject: The 31st of December 1999 > 'Twas the night before 2000 and all through the tower, > applications were failing, more by the hour........ > The programs were running on the mainframe with care, > in hope that the millennium bug was not there. > The programmers were seated in front of their PC's, > while visions of blank paychecks danced in their heads. > With Amy in her office and I at my desk, > we had just settled down for a night with no rest. > When up on my screen there arose such a ding, > I sprang from my chair screaming. "I didn't touch a thing!" > Away from my computer I ran real quick, > tore open the drawer and picked up a stick. > I glared at the PC, evil and mean, then realized ... > it's just a machine. > What to my wondering eyes should I see, > but a miniature window, and a message for me. > With tired eyes, I gave a glance, > only hours left...... we don't have a chance! > More rapid than eagles the languages fell, > and we whistled, and shouted, and called with a yell; > "Now COBOL! Now, NATURAL, Batch and On-line! > Oh, FORTRAN! Oh SAS! Now CHORE went flat-line! > From the front of my face, to the face of the wall, > now bash away! Bash away! Bash away all! > As the team gathered together for one last try, > the word from management came... "Fix it or die!" > So they sat in their chairs, in the upright position, > with a desk full of work, and a nasty disposition! > And then, in a dinging, I heard the speaker mention, > "Attention, the building, Attention." > As he tried to speak the next word, > the crashing of the mainframe is all we heard. > The programs were a mess, from start to end. > My screen was tarnished with an ugly abend. > The team assembled, into one huge pack, > we looked like hungry wolves, ready to attack. > Our eyes -- how they twinkled! > Our fingers typed with a clank. > Fix Payroll we said, > because our paychecks are blank! > The sweat on my face was falling like rain, > while the coding of COBOL drove me insane! > The stump of a pencil I held tight in my hand, > I chewed nervously, hoping I would not get canned! > I coded some Windows and a Bridge too, > that took a program from version one to two. > I was tired, weak, and in a delusion state, > and I laughed when I saw it, in spite of fate. > A wink of his eye and a twist of his head, > soon let me know that bug was not dead! > It spoke not a word, but went straight to work, > crashing the remaining programs, then turned with a jerk. > I placed the cursor next to the bug, > pressed the delete key to remove the little thug. > But I heard it exclaim, as I erased the line..... > "Happy Millennium for now, 'cause I'll return in 9999!"  Cheers!Knowlege tempered by wisdom...Wisdom tamed by youth. |
||
| © Copyright 1999 Rob Evans - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
ROFL but thank heavens some are worried, because it will help to pay my bills..*g*...ooops... HUGS Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream... |
||
|
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Love this! |
||
|
Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
well I for one am glad Y2K is keeping our computer people busy, so they will quit keeping an eye on me ...lol...a girl needs to play.....great poem, thanks for sharing |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
