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Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member

since 1999-11-11

Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA

0 posted 1999-11-12 04:20 AM

Death of a Friend

What can you say to a dying friend,
one whose life has scarce begun?
Consoling words seem patronizing;
nothing said, adequate.

Deny. This isn't happening.
Shun each cold reminder.

Amidst his witnessed suffering
and shallow beneath my sympathy
crouches such brutality--
(an honest evaluation?)
"Better him than me."

Stupid we all stand
before this hideous inevitable,
punch lines to the victor's final joke.

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

1 posted 1999-11-12 06:35 AM

Kenneth, through the vigil you keep ... a sincere I love you, my friend.

------------------
~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member

since 1999-11-11

Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA

2 posted 1999-11-12 08:08 AM

Marge, thank you.

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

3 posted 1999-11-12 08:12 AM

It is difficult to lose a friend, but to watch someone slowly wither away is doubly hard. Find the strength to be there for your friend, he's afraid of what's happening, and in the end you will find peace also.

Welcome to the Passions Family! Please let me know if I can be of assistance to you.

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

4 posted 1999-11-12 12:19 PM

This is so sad, yes it's hard to know what to say, but sometimes just being there is enough. By the way, great final lines in this

Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member

since 1999-11-11

Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA

5 posted 1999-11-12 02:01 PM

You all make me out to be a better person than I am. I've been too afraid to visit him. I've witnessed his suffering only through the eyes of a mutual friend. Hence my lines: "Deny. This isn't happening./Shun each cold reminder." I'm a very bad person.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

6 posted 1999-11-12 02:29 PM

Great poem and said with such honesty. You are fairly normal to avoid a situation like this that you don't know how to handle. Don't be so hard on yourself.

Andrew Scott
Member Elite

since 1999-06-24

Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA

7 posted 1999-11-12 03:27 PM

Kenneth: Death is a tough thing to deal with, especially when you have a chance to see it coming. About a year ago I had a friend die of cancer... she was 40. We thought she had a fighting chance, but it became clear towards the end what the outcome would be. I don't think I ever really talked to her about the hard facts of her illness... I think it was good enough just to be there and share what time remained. Perhaps I could have done more as others did, but I did what I felt I could. It doesn't make me a good or bad person one way or the other. And it will be the same for you. Do what you can. To one degree or another, we're all scared of the great unknown... but it makes it easier if we can be scared together. My best to you in this difficult time.

I'd also like to echo the Lady Hoot as to those final lines. Well written... and welcome to the fold.

Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member

since 1999-11-11

Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA

8 posted 1999-11-12 06:01 PM

Martie & Andrew,
Thank you for the encouraging words. I'm going to try to visit him this weekend. Since he doesn't live really close, I've been able to simply procrastinate. I just don't feel a letter would be appropriate. And "get well" card would be silly.

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

9 posted 1999-11-12 09:43 PM

Welcome to Passions, Kenneth. No you're not a bad person. What you are feeling is all quite normal. It is very hard to know what to say or do. Just being there would be a blessing to him. So just think about that and you'll feel less uncomfortable. And your friend will be glad you came!

------------------
Denise

Marilyn
Member Elite

since 1999-09-26

Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada

10 posted 1999-11-12 09:54 PM

Welocme to Passions Kenneth.

This is indeed a difficult thing to witness. I have to echo andrew's words. Just be there...visit as you can and write those darn letters. Any contact lets him/her know that yu are at least thinking about them.

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