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Open Poetry #4
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Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada

0 posted 1999-12-01 08:45 PM


I surrender to your will.
To your touch,
And to your skill.
I give you everything and more,
You touch me to my very core.
I'll be to you,
Just what you need.
You've sowed in me,
A precious seed.
You give to me,
All I could dream.
You even cover,
With whipped cream.
What I really want to say,
You complete me every day.
So close your eyes,
Take my hand.
Together,
We'll find the promised land.


[This message has been edited by Marilyn (edited 12-01-1999).]

[This message has been edited by Marilyn (edited 12-01-1999).]

© Copyright 1999 Marilyn - All Rights Reserved
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
1 posted 1999-12-01 08:52 PM


Smiles...for someone who said she didn't think she could love....sounds like you got the idea down pretty good my friend

------------------
"When you come to the edge of the light which is all you know. And are about to step off into the darkness that is unknown...Faith is knowing one of two things will happen...there will be something to stand on...or you will learn how to fly." -Unknown

Kevin
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 1999-11-02
Posts 729
Torrington, Ct, Usa
2 posted 1999-12-01 08:55 PM


lol im sorry but from such a beautiful poem all i can think about is varsity blues and the whip cream bikini
ah well sweet dreams tonight, balladeer would understand =)

Ohme
Senior Member
since 1999-07-17
Posts 816
Texas
3 posted 1999-12-01 09:00 PM


aaaahhh, Liked it.
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

4 posted 1999-12-01 09:03 PM


Sounds good to me! Great poem, Marilyn!

------------------
Denise


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
5 posted 1999-12-01 09:25 PM


Ruth my friend....I love very deeply. The trouble is; I don't love ones accessable...lol.

Kevin...LMAO...what a picture you left in my head!

Thanks Ohme.

Denise....Thanks my friend.

RobertB
Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104
Champaign, IL
6 posted 1999-12-01 09:30 PM


good poem Marilyn....liked the style. I did.

RB

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

8 posted 1999-12-05 07:28 AM


Lovely Marilyn.
Love can be hard - understatement of the year! (Millenium?)

caroline
Senior Member
since 1999-08-16
Posts 1218
http://members.xoom.com/belladona123/index.htm
9 posted 1999-12-05 03:07 PM


Very beautiful, Marilyn  

 It's not the love you fear, but the fall from the height~Edwin McCain


Seaangel
Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 167
Auckland, New Zealand
10 posted 1999-12-05 03:31 PM


lovely
can I ask what you do with the whipped cream?
(LOL)

Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
11 posted 1999-12-06 12:48 PM


Robert..Thankyou.

Severn....definately the understatement of the millenium!!

caroline....Thankyou  

Seaangel...the reference wasn't meant to be sexual in nature...lol. It was meant more in getting everything you want with whipped cream on top. :0

Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
12 posted 1999-12-06 01:46 PM


Very beautiful...and I really dig the word-art picture of a vase.  

The scheme had me a little baffled until I read it outloud...then all became clear.  I can see the tetrameter, but there is some variance between iambic and trochiac...or it could be just me.  

Thank you for posting this.

Alicat  

 The Persnikitty



suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
13 posted 1999-12-06 02:01 PM


I like this very much!  
Kitty**
Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 428
Charlottesville,VA USA
14 posted 1999-12-06 02:24 PM


WOW..this I like and it's one I can identify
with..

seem to love the unaccesable too!!! ;-(

Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
15 posted 1999-12-06 05:26 PM


Beautiful indeed Marilyn!!

 A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire!



Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
16 posted 1999-12-07 01:25 AM


Marilyn -

This is truly beautiful, as love is supposed to be.  Hope the tide turns and takes you out on the sea of love.  


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Sally S.
Senior Member
since 1999-06-07
Posts 847
Ohio
17 posted 1999-12-07 01:29 AM


Lovely thoughts, indeed.  ~sigh~  I love love.    
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

18 posted 1999-12-07 04:27 AM


Beautiful Marilyn

 What comes from the heart goes to the heart.
Samuel Coleridge



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