We Never Had a Chance (Negative Imagery?)

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Not A Poet
Member Elite

since 1999-11-03

Posts 3885
Oklahoma, USA

0 posted 2006-01-22 08:46 PM

We Never Had A Chance

Long ago there was a time
When I could hold you – Call you mine;
I still recall our favorite song
And how you used to sing along,
The games we played, as lovers will
When all alone, and then the thrill
To think we had a future planned
Of life together, hand-in-hand
Rejoicing in our lover's dream . . .
We would have made a perfect team.

Now there's little I can do
But cherish memories of you
Imagining a different past
In which our love would always last,
And thoughts of that leave me bereft
At knowing none of it is left
But fantasies of what I missed
And eyes that closed each time we kissed.

Since I never had a chance
To ask you for that final dance,
There'll never be another time
When I can hold you – Call you mine.

Brian James
Member

since 2005-06-26

Posts 147
Winnipeg

1 posted 2006-01-22 09:18 PM

Pete,

Excellently written. I think you understood pretty well what I had in mind for this assignment---seeing things that aren't there, and letting us see them as well. The warmth of the first stanza is very carefully overshadowed by the fact of its having to end (a truth that you maintain through precision of tone rather than contrary description).

The sweetness of the imagery you use makes for a powerfully bitter experience of loss. Except perhaps for the fact that I don't fully understand the title, I have to say this is a successful take on the assignment.

Thanks for taking part.

Brian

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

2 posted 2006-01-31 05:10 PM

That was just heartwarming Pete, and I got the title, and had one of those myself once

You did your homework on this one that is for sure.

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

3 posted 2006-03-08 10:54 PM

wonderfully done,

and this?

''Since I never had a chance
To ask you for that final dance,
There'll never be another time
When I can hold you – Call you mine''

aches.....nice to read your words Pete...

And so it those we live with
and should know who elude us
But we can still love them
we can love completely
without complete understanding

Herumtreiber
New Member

since 2006-02-17

Posts 8
California, USA

4 posted 2006-03-09 02:56 AM

All of the above, simply beautiful.

eor
Senior Member

since 2002-09-26

Posts 959
blues & greys

5 posted 2006-03-14 04:03 PM

i enjoyed this, but when you say negitive imagery i think of something different. I think i understad it in this case as something that was there and is not anymore, like a picture, and all that is left is the negitive, or the image in your head, i much perfer to think of negitive imagery that way than as i do think of it, as something negitive, bad, unwelcoming, harmful...anyways, nice write, enjoyed it.

A change is going to come...

curiouse
Member

since 2006-03-21

Posts 277
england

6 posted 2006-04-04 04:14 AM

lovely...curiouse

brock6472
New Member

since 2006-03-11

Posts 1
tx,us

7 posted 2006-04-13 12:22 PM

Good way to put your words together. I feel you on this one.

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.