»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #2
»
Love, Hate, and the Mountain
| Teen Poetry #2 |
|
Love, Hate, and the Mountain |
|
|
Ashiraladoni Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 52Duluth, MN, USA |
You knew I loved you, but now I hate you because of the Mountain of Differences that we have encountered together. I loved you for many reasons, but now I hate you for only one reason. I hate you because of the Mountain of Differences. Together we tried to overcome those odds, and we believed that it would only take Love to conquer them. But Time proved to be our enemy. And the Mountain of Differences just grew bigger. Why oh why must it be this way. Why oh why must it hurt this way? Why oh why my I hate you for hurting me? The Mountain of Differences drove us apart. All we had was Love, now it's Hate and the Mountain. |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Heidi Wiitanen - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
dixie_stix3309 Junior Member
since 2000-02-25
Posts 11 |
Don't you realize the pain I hold, in my arms, so ever bold. Don't you realize what you put me trough, when you said there's nothing left to do. Don't you realize, my hopes and dreams, were tworn away be your dismeans. Don't you realize the true me, the one that you never did see. Don't you realize through all the years, I have cried many tears. Don't you realize for what it's worth, I have loved you since my birth. Don't you realize what's before you, what I say, won't come before you. I have one last thing to say, I love you, in every way! |
||
|
Paul Hoekman Member
since 1999-12-28
Posts 382Harwinton Ct. U>S>A> |
I like the concept I find myself worn out by the hate and pain the mountain of differences seems to be built with. It might be interesting to see this expanded by using different stone to describe the differences and feelings? Hate like granite although I never really care to see or hear the word hate . Untrust like layers of slate building up yet able to be easily chipped away by the strong weathers of Love and honesty. WELCOME! Keep up the good work. |
||
|
Astraea Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 378California! Yeah! Okay, I'm done now |
Sounds bitter. But differences sometimes override love and all you have left is that bittersweet feeling that may sour into something more. But that mountain can be climbed! Just need patience, love, and a whole lot of trust in the climbing utilities. Nice poem, but please, I can see that you have the talent, but just a little more with a better format. Welcome to Passions, welcome to the Teen Forum. ~Astraea "Sometimes stars can only be seen in darkness." "Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things." |
||
|
emptyness Member
since 2000-03-09
Posts 95mobile,Ala,USA |
John Lennon said it best "all you need is love" even though it really isnt it just came to mind after i read it |
||
|
Crystalina123 Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 228 |
First off, welcome! Second, I liked the poem and I can relate to it. It was a good poem but (in my pinion)might be in need of some structural reformating. Such as: You knew I loved you, but now I hate you Because of the Mountain of Differences, that we have encountered together. I loved you for many reasons, but now I hate you for only one reason. I hate you, because of the Mountain of Differences. Together we tried to overcome those odds, and we believed, that it would only take Love to conquer them. But Time proved to be our enemy. And the Mountain of Differences just grew bigger. Why oh why must it be this way. Why oh why must it hurt this way? Why oh why my I hate you for hurting me? The Mountain of Differences drove us apart. All we had was Love, now it's Hate and the Mountain. -- Just a thought, take it for what its worth. Godd poem, and welcome! Crystal "The worst of what people do to one another is deceive. Because when you love someone you control their version of reality. If you lie to them that's like making them autistic so that what they believe is reality is in fact, not their true situation at all." It's not the angry words that break the heart, it's the silence. Someone said that true love is like a ghost -- often spoke of but never seen. I've seen both and yet in my darkest hours, tend to believe that neither exits. |
||
|
Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
sorry for double post, computer burped. [This message has been edited by Danny Holloway (edited 03-10-2000).] |
||
|
Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
Reminds of that thin line they say between love and hate. With two individuals, there will always be differences. The strength of a relationship, I think, is the ability and patience to work through the differences. I have found that the first ingredient of a relationshiop is acceptance. We can't change people and we shouldn't try to change anyone but ourselves. Excuse me for rambling. Hope some of this makes sense. Welcome to passions. |
||
|
rich-pa Member
since 2000-02-07
Posts 317New Orleans, Louisiana |
i'll have to say firstly that i loved the content of the piece, then i'll have to say that is it what i believe to be dire need of structural reformation. the current form of the poem read more like a piece of prose than poetry (not to say it's not a good piece). oh and emptyness, john lennon was right..."all you need is love" |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
