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Open Poetry #1

Unfinished

Christina Myers
Member

since 1999-06-21

Posts 159

0 posted 1999-06-23 12:20 PM

your words break me

there!
you have my weakness in your mouth

when your words storm over me
I am like a child
running from the downpour
caught without her galoshes and parka

mother would be so angry

I let your words work at me
twist me
and turn me inside out

all because you touch a hidden spot

And when the onslaught is done
when the clouds have passed
I stand
alone
dripping into the puddle of your words

throw me a towel...

I'm drowning here
without you

sinking
in
the
silence
of
you

with nothing to say

Krystal
Member

since 1999-06-19

Posts 140
Shelton,WA USA

1 posted 1999-06-23 06:40 PM

Good... I can identify. You've touched on an issue that I personally face, letting someone else's words control how you live your life, even when you don't want that person to have control. Or someone's silence.... which may be more painful than actual words!

------------------
Shannon D. Montgomery
("Krystal")

#5 PS
Junior Member

since 1999-06-21

Posts 19
Ogden, Utah, USA

2 posted 1999-06-24 09:57 AM

I think I have to agree with Krystal, when the hail of words are doing their damage its hard to move on or think clearly, but I think the most damage is done when its over and you have time to dwell. A very good piece! I like that you put "I am like a child" I feel that everyone is still a child when you dig deep inside, everyone still has the lose little feelings to hurt and everyone still cries.

------------------
#5 Poetic Society

doreen peri
Member Elite

since 1999-05-25

Posts 3812
Virginia

3 posted 1999-06-24 11:05 AM

You are quite the creative writer! Words are indeed very powerful. I have a poem about words, too. I think I'll find it and post it. particularly like the line, "I stand alone dripping into the puddle". Good work!

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

4 posted 2004-04-23 03:19 AM

this aches

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