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WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois

0 posted 1999-08-15 01:27 PM


I really need to bounce this off someone.
If their are words I can change to make it better, or leave it how it is. I would appreciate the help.


It breaks my heart dear friend
To see what they're puttin you through
They don't see nor understand
Oh, if only that they knew.

If they could understand
And the knowledge of God retain
I truly do believe
Their lips they would refrain.

They know not what they say
No knowledge of what they do
Hurtful things they speak
With no idea they hurt you.

They're striking out in anger
Rage is all they see
They truly cannot understand
What this lie will do to thee.

They stand in frustration
Knowing not what to do
And listen to the others
And shift the blame on you.

I know right now your hurting
My heart for you does bleed
But I will always be there
In your times of joy or need.

For you are very precious
And you mean a lot to me
It was only by the will of God
Our friendship came to be.

All that I can tell you
Is pray within your heart
That they will come to understand
From God you will not part.

My friend it rests with God
And all that's in His will
No matter what may happen
I will love you still.

© Copyright 1999 WhtDove - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
1 posted 1999-08-15 01:49 PM


Whtdove, there is a strong message in this poem but it does need a lot of work. I would be happy to go into it in detail and e-mail my suggestions to you, if you would like. Let me know.
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
2 posted 1999-08-15 02:00 PM


That would be greatly appreciated Balladeer!!
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