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blueloon
Member

since 1999-07-07

Posts 161
NY

0 posted 1999-07-09 11:23 AM

In my room I sit alone.
Alone in a rooms that swirls,
around and around.
Pictures. Thoughts. Sounds.
The sounds of silence.
A silence that lurks within me
disturbs me from my sleep.
The silence lays so still urupts
into screams.
Screams o my past.
The hands and lips that robs my body
of it's innocence.
I fight the tears.
The harder I fought, the faster they flowed.
Flowed like a river,
a river that never ended.
I tried to swim that river.
But, I only seemed to drown,
in the darkness of my screams.
Silence.
It overcomes me once again.
The swirls have setteled.
But, the thoughts still lurked
in the inky darkness of my soul.
A chill came over my quivering body.
I began to feel naked.
Naked like Eve, only covered by a leaf.
Careful not to eat the poisenous fruit.
Hungry for love, I reach for the fruit.
The fruit of passion;
red, round and luscious.
He picked a single cherry
before I.
My innocense lost.
Lost within my silence.

mia
Member

since 1999-07-06

Posts 118

1 posted 1999-07-09 11:41 AM

i really dug it. Like you pinched a string in my heart with your words.

Alwye

Moderator

Member Elite

since 1999-06-16

Posts 3850
In the space between moments

2 posted 1999-07-31 11:52 PM

So very sad...you tug at my heartstrings.

------------------
*Krista Knutson*

"I will sail my vessel 'till the river runs dry, like a bird upon the wind, these waters are my sky..." Garth Brooks

blueloon
Member

since 1999-07-07

Posts 161
NY

3 posted 1999-08-02 09:16 AM

I am sorry Alwye, I do not mean to make you sad...Thank you for your support...
blueloon

poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite

since 1999-07-25

Posts 2646
Arkansas

4 posted 1999-08-13 12:45 PM

Nice - very nice....Loved the line "...inky darkness of my soul..." Made the whole poem great, and definately set the mood....your choice of words - superb.

------------------
- poet FemmeFatale

"The strongest man in the world is he who stands most alone..." Henrik Ibsen (1826-1906) Norwegian dramatist lyric poet

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

5 posted 1999-08-13 04:09 PM

I especially like the pace of the poem where each line pulls you to the next and sets a terrific tempo. Nice job.

blueloon
Member

since 1999-07-07

Posts 161
NY

6 posted 1999-08-17 09:23 PM

I am flattered by both of your words...To be exact I am blushing....Thank you
blueloon

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

7 posted 1999-08-18 12:53 PM

Excellent form - I like the way this reads.

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