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Open Poetry #2
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Crossing Deserts
| Open Poetry #2 |
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Crossing Deserts |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704
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Silence in that chamber of the heart that belongs to you alone I hear your voice always though at times you hide from me 'I've been busy' yet you tell me 'you're not alone in this feeling' in this suffering I want you here now just to look in your eyes and hear your whisper against my hair so cruel Dearest that such strength of passion is futile we both live for passion: of words, of thought of the imagined touch of us the unimaginable touch of us for we would be consumed in our own fire of devasted love a phoenix without wings These people drifting in and out of our lives don't spark our fevers yet you ignite me and I you one look of you and I am aflame alight burning ash What else is there? Who else? Tell me and I would cross deserts for relief I'm not sure I can be like you loving another and loving you apart Perhaps for me your heart burns only red fire while mine is pale as snow hotter than the sun I could go on and on sending words into the silent air words you'll never hear Sending the cries of my heart the lost cries of my heart 9.9.99 ------------------ 'Only the shallow know themselves.' Oscar Wilde. |
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| © Copyright 1999 Kamla Mahony - All Rights Reserved | |||
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roxane Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 505us |
I really liked this one. I really could never make a suggestion on it. It just flowed in all the right places and I completely related to it. Thank you for a great read.  |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
ThankYOU for reading and liking, roxane!  |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Severn, this is very, very good. There is a ton of thoughts in this poem and a lot of sad/angry/longing feelings. Many thoughts here can be related to easily |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
What can I say, I agree with Balladeer on this! Very well done! |
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Tara Simms Senior Member
since 1999-08-12
Posts 1244Honea Path, SC USA |
I've felt that before. You expressed it beautifully. |
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moonmoon Member
since 1999-08-13
Posts 277TX , USA |
Severn, your poem ignited a plethora of emotions in me..What touched me most was the devastation of love & the metaphor 'pheonix without wings'... Thanks for the read.. ------------------ "No one was ever ruined from without; The final ruin comes from within.".....Amelia E. Barr |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
wow! Thankyou all so much. Balladeer - I'm overcome by your praise. WhiteDove - I echo the sentiment Tara - it's a hard feeling is it not? moonmoon - like I said to roxane - thankYOU |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Egad girl! You just keep getting better and better. You know how I know that? Because I can find absolutely no fault with this. The passion in this is sweltering! I abslutely LOVED how you broke up: I want you here now A graceful bow accompanied by hearty applause! |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
Severn this is excellent..... ------------------ May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Chris - a big bow in return! Pepper - thankyou |
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caroline Senior Member
since 1999-08-16
Posts 1218http://members.xoom.com/belladona123/index.htm |
Severn...I can't find enough praise for this one! It is perfection! I wish I had written this myself ------------------ The only man worth your tears will never make you cry... |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Severn, what a masterpiece! So much emotion, so skillfully displayed. Absolutely beautiful! ------------------ Denise |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
I've just read your replies, caroline and dsnyder and I'm truly stunned at your praise. Thankyou both very very much. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Very Passionate K, Wow! I don't know how I missed this one. Maree "little miss understood |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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