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majnu
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0 posted 2002-11-11 02:39 PM


Get Teenage Girls Off the Road

One day while driving south on particularly straight and boring patch I680 in California I noticed a blue Volkswagen Beatle that said Princess on the license plate holder. Now at the time I was nineteen years old and being a virile male teenager, I said to myself, "Well lets have a look   ." So I proceeded to do just that. As I passed the car on its left (I was illegally in the carpool lane), I matched her speed so as to shoot a glance over.
What I saw was a cute teenage girl doing her makeup. Now this may not seem to be a problem but as you shall soon see it was. This princess had her compact out and was applying whatever that stuff in there is, to her face. She was holding the compact in one hand, the applicator in the other and was engrossed in perfecting the paintjob. My conclusion is that her wheels were aligned very well.
This my friends is not however an isolated incident. While in high school I noticed girls doing makeup while driving quite often. This was very disturbing because they did not care nearly as much for their cars as I did for mine. This also meant that they were less careful on the road. My conclusion is that teenage girls should not be allowed to drive. Many people may claim that this is unfair, discriminatory, etc. Poppycock. To change the licensing age for females to thirty-one would actually solve many problems. First of all it would eliminate the majority of the do your make-up, pet your dog, talk on your cell phone, brush your hair, etc. while driving group. Secondly, it would remove one of the major distractions plaguing our roads today. Teenage girls are a major accident risk. One might say that they actually need to be allowed only in cars with tinted windows. I mean come on, how many times have you (I address this to my fellow males) slowed down to check out some cutie in the car next to you. Or changed lanes hoping to get a better view. This my friends is a serious problem; the reason being that instead of checking your mirror when you change lanes, you are checking out some girl’s chest. Now while there is nothing intrinsically wrong with scoping out the babes, it definitely is a safety risk at eighty miles per hour. The answer, again, is to get them off the road, into tinted cars, and off the sidewalk. Yes the sidewalk too. Think about how many time you have had to floor the brakes because you were paying too much attention to the girl in short shorts on the sidewalk and forgot about the red light ahead. These distractions need to be removed or else nobody will be safe on the roads.


// flameguard disclaimer: its just a joke, don't take it too seriously, and don't tell any of my female friends!        


[This message has been edited by majnu (11-11-2002 02:44 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Zaheer Abbas Ali - All Rights Reserved
Kielo
Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109

1 posted 2002-11-11 02:55 PM


LOL... Guys are fine to drive though. Can't see their butts if they're sitting on 'em. heh.

Wait a minute... I don't like guys... What am I saying?! *shudder*

I'm having a weird day. Anyway, I liked it very much. Quite funny.

Kielo

According to statistics, a man eats a prune every twenty seconds. I don't know who this fellw is, but I know where to find him.
-Morey Amsterdam

Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2002-11-11 03:12 PM



Seems to me it wasn't her driving in the carpool lane checking YOU out!  LOL...very cute.

Wind
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since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

3 posted 2002-11-11 03:36 PM


Girls aren't the only ones who do their makeup while driving.....

"Sticks and stones will break my bones,
But words will break my heart"

Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2002-11-11 04:12 PM


Cute! But I think you make more of a case for keeping GUYS out of cars than girls!
WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
5 posted 2002-11-12 11:08 AM


Don't tell any of your female friends indeed. They didn't have to, I found it on my own, and well and

That's all I have to say.

Crysania
Member
since 2002-09-21
Posts 67
Lost in a dream. (Please don't wake!)
6 posted 2002-11-12 03:22 PM


Thank you kindly for the laugh!

Do what you want and say what you feel. Those who matter won't mind and those who mind don't matter. (Unknown)

ESP
Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556
Floating gently on a cloud....
7 posted 2002-11-12 10:40 PM


LMAO!!!!!!!!! U'd be good at debating I reckon, being able to argue so convincingly and all, a relatively zany motion! Thanx for a fun read!!
Luv, Liz xx

Skyfire
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since 2000-12-27
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8 posted 2002-11-12 10:58 PM


*smirks*

I am a Knight who says Ni!

majnu
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
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since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088
SF Bay Area
9 posted 2002-11-12 11:16 PM


kielo, i won't ask.

sunshine, nope she was too self absorbed.

wind, fine, girls and party clowns!

poetdevine, am I?

rose, i probably would have e-mailed it over to you if you hadn't found it.

crysania, you are welcome, its good for your health you know.

esp, ty, i have done a bit of forensics

skyfire, are you smirking out of mirth, out of spite, or because you know its true

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

Skyfire
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since 2000-12-27
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Riding
10 posted 2002-11-14 02:14 AM


lol both

I am a Knight who says Ni!

Allysa
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In an upside-down garden
11 posted 2002-11-14 10:17 AM


This cracked me up, however, you need to take into consideration the portion of the femal population that does not war make-up, implying that this percent of the population would not be putting on make-up while operating an automobile.

what the hell am I arguing about?  I can't even drive.

"Wie ein Quadrat in einem Kreis, eck' ich immer wieder an obwohl ich doch schon lange weiß, daß ich niemals ändern kann." ~Wizo

Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
12 posted 2002-11-17 01:13 AM


ROTFLMAO at this one. Thank God my daughter wants a horse, not wheels. Not yet, anyway.
Even better? she doesn't wear makeup!

But I might have to worry about cell phones some day, or a laptop PC.

You are a funny guy! But you really need to keep your eyes on the road instead of the bumps on the road.

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