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Tabby Moon (4 of 8)
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Tabby Moon (4 of 8) |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now 
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This is it fr t'day! I'll post s'more tomorrow. Or later. Whatever.  Tabby Moon 4 of 8 The doctors let us take Tabitha home. One of them gave Dad the phone number of a good psychiatrist, and said it would be smart to check that out. Tabby would have told the doctor where to put it, but we left before she could. She wouldn’t go inside the house when we got home. Dad wasn’t going to rush her, so he left us out in the yard. Tabby was staring at the nearly full moon. “Damn clouds,” she muttered. “There’s nothing to see, anyway.” I would have gone in, but I was afraid to leave her alone. “Nothing to see? Neilster, the night is magic. I told you that way before I ODed on my first drug trip. It’s powerful. That’s why people are scared of it; its power is humbling. Only people who understand the night don’t need to run away.” “I don’t understand it, but I don’t need to run.” “Actually, you understand it more than a lot of other people.” “What’s there to understand about it, though? Oh wow, the world turns away from the sun. It’s not even night now, Tabby. Let’s go in.” She cocked her head to the left. “Night’s more powerful than day. You can see the moon during the day, but where’s the sun at night?” “On the other side of the world. Tabby--” “Go away, Neil.” She turned her back to me. “If you’re going to be the concerned, caring, scientific, and Christian brother, don’t talk to me. Just don’t talk to me.” I closed my mouth. What could I say after that? ‘Sorry’ never worked with Tabitha. She was busy ignoring me, anyway. She was dancing (gracefully, as always), probably hearing the music in her head. When she murmured a few lines of Neuromancer to herself, I decided to leave her alone. I headed up the deck, to the front door. “Wait, Neil.” Her voice was soft. “What?” “Do you think I’m crazy?” “Depends on why you’re asking.” She laughed. “Too true, brother o’ mine.” She sighed. “For what I did. Do you think I’m crazy?” “I can’t decide either way until I know why you did it.” “’Cause Tabby Cat’s a very, very stupid little girl.” She joined me on the deck. “I’m...” She stopped, made a face. It seemed as though she was gagging on her words. She tried again. “I’m a woman now, Neil, and I don’t want to be.” She let out a long breath, looking disappointed in herself. This was a lot of weakness for her to be showing. “I’ve got a job, but I don’t want the responsibility. I’ve got a steady boyfriend and I don’t want the commitment. I wanted to be free... I wanted to fly.” “Tabitha...” “I wanted to understand love, too. Just once... But I don’t get to be free, I don’t get to understand, so the only consolation is that I got to fly for a while.” She leaned against the rail. “Do you understand?” “I want to.” She closed her eyes. “I thought you were happy, Tabby. I mean--” “It’s how I’ve gotta’ act. I’ll go crazy if I don’t at least pretend to be happy. ‘Sides, what sort of older sister goes around depressing her younger brother?” “I think you landing yourself in the hospital is pretty harsh. “I’m still alive, aren’t I?” She stared off into space for a while, then looked back at me. “What if I’m not alive, Neil? What if this is ... just some messed up dream. Just the thing that happens when you die.” “So why would I be here?” “’Cause I need you.” She pushed back from the rail. “You’re my straight-man, Bro. Where would I be without my straight-man?” “Never leave home without him,” I muttered. She grinned. “I love you too, Neil. Let’s go in. I’m not going to rest until I’ve got you hooked on Cyberpunk, do you understand?” “You won’t be resting for a while, Tabby.” “And neither will you.” She smiled innocently at me and went into the house. I sighed and followed. impress me, or be discarded mpc [This message has been edited by Anvrill (08-11-2002 11:10 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 LL Hager - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
good resolution, although the search goes on. It impresses me that you have captured the questing heart with all it's passion, strength and fraility. When you post the rest let me know and I will be there to read. Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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