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gerbildom
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gerbildom |
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JamesBowie Member
since 2000-11-25
Posts 252big old Bangor Maine up by the shack |
I could feel his glassy eyes pass over me as I slept. I never trusted him, which’s why I put him in a cage. Most people cage gerbils because they believe it makes them feel happy and comfortable, oh but not me. I know what evil lies in the hearts of men- and it's name is fluffy the gerbil. Oh cute name. My daughter loves the tittering little squeals of delight she thinks that it makes when it plays with her. But she is not that bright, she is only a little kid. I know that those squeals are it's songs of worship to the evil gerbil gods. He is calling on the powers of the ancient mammoth gerbils that roamed the plains long before man ever came to live upright. The gerbils once ruled the earth in a time now forgotten and very overlooked except by those few who understand what is really going on. Roswell, was not about aliens, but about a pack of feral gerbils who had slaughtered an entire army platoon before being killed by specially trained kids who came in with their cages and eventually handled the gerbils so much that they died while being forced to run on their wheels for days at a time. These kids were heroes. Damn good Americans. I see now that you are staRTING TO DOUBT WHAT i SAY. Well let me tell you what happened next. As I began to wake from my deep well deserved sleep, I could feel something abrasive on my arms and feet. Some sort of moisture had gathered upon my face, urine, it stank of urine. As I opened my eyes I saw that the cage door as well as the bedroom window were both open. I tried to sit up, and then I noticed the ropes that had me tied down to the bed. The ropes looked like finely woven fur, gerbil fur. I knew then that I was doomed, I was to late in my knowledge of gerbildoms evil plans. I searched the room frantically and could see nothing. That is when the skittering and squealing chants began. A long cold chill raced up my spine as I saw their shadows dance against the walls, illuminated by fires lit upon their cedar cage bedding. Their dances became more frenzied, their eyes and teeth gleaming in the dark night. Then everything stopped, as the gerbil chief, my daughter's gerbil, began to recite incantations from the necronomicon ex- mortis (the book of the dead) He glowed with a surreal light as he called upon the powers of darkness. In my mind I was already wondering what type of death I was going to endure, what twisted scheme these gerbils had designed for me. I began to weep, then suddenly a large nose came through the bedroom door. Sleek and quiet, I could just make out the outlines of my dog Charlie. He was a descendant of the great German and Labrador clans, a mixed mutt warrior. He crept slowly into the room while the gerbils, who were consumed by their work, never noticed him. He became a swift blur darting in and out of frightened packs of gerbils, gnashing and snapping with all his white toothed might. The gerbils did not stand a chance. They scattered, the routed rodents squealing madly off out through the window into the cold unforgiving night where they would most likely be captured and put to use as circus midgets or as common house pets. Oh the indignity. As my dog chewed through the hamster hair ropes, I patted him and began to put out the fires. I like my dog. I hate gerbils. |
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| © Copyright 2002 James Bowie - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
James, very, very funny. Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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