navwin » Main Forums » Passions in Prose » Fresh Laundry
Passions in Prose
Post A Reply Post New Topic Fresh Laundry Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2001-11-06 07:17 AM


She walked into the bar, with more composure than an eighteen-year old should. She walked into the bar, carrying an ashe blonde cocker spaniel and wearing white gloves. She saw the amusement in the eyes of the other patrons as she sat at the bar, and stroking the puppy with more reassurance than she felt, she ordered a "cherry coke." The lines of her stockings were straight and she sat, tall-shouldered and dignified and as the barmaid proffered her a bottled coke, with some splashed out, and a bit of cherry juice splashed carelessly in-- my mother said, "I would like a straw with that please."

"Oh...Yes, MA'AM..." the barmaid replied with mock dignity..."And tell me, would you like a stem with your cherry?"

My mother looked down,blushing, out of her element. It stank of smoke and Taboo in there. She was scared but wouldn't show it.

The barmaid had a bit of mercy and asked, "Honey, you look lost here. Is there someone that you are looking for?"

"Well, yes..." my mother stammered. "But maybe not. I was supposed to meet a guy named Wilmer here."

And with the cackle of a wicked witch, the barmaid pointed out my mother's date---my father--head cradled in his own arms, passed out, completely at the bar. In full Navy dress. Snoring.

My mother, though, was, and is, a woman of dignity, and said, "thank you," as she sat and pondered her dilemma. She was in a service man's bar--surrounded by women who tended such men. And there was her date--passed out--stone cold drunk and ugly--and she thought of her dimes within her purse, that she kept for emergency calls, but something in her made her sit taller, as she noticed the interest that she brought in with her. White pleated dress, cinched at the waste and a chaste scoop neckline, donned with mock pearls. She stood out in that wasteland of red-and-black dress and smoke and too-much-lipstick. So she sat, and contemplated her passed out date. She wondered what his face looked like.

It was a blind date--designed to annoy her mother, who found a blood relation to every boy she had ever brought home--saying "No, you can't date HIM. He's your eighth cousin on your father's mother's side..." So in desperation, she took the wild card. A blind date, with a Navy man from Texas. And there he was. Passed out. So she carefully crossed her straight-seamed stockinged legs and sipped her cherry coke.

My father later, much, much later, told me the rest of the story. He had drank too many beers even then when he told me the story, and although my mother told him to "hush" I saw her blush with pleasure at the memory of it. I was young, but smart, and sat quietly and let them tell their story.


"I smelled her, before I saw her," he said. He had that wonderful Texan drawl. "She smelled like laundry, fresh, hanging on the line, and it woke me straight up, because I thought of Mama."

"She reminded me of home and I woke up---hell--I didn't know--but I knew she was for real before I opened my eyes." He paused then, and I saw him tenderly touch her knee. "It was the luckiest day of my life. But I took one look at her and knew she wasn't proper there---so I took her straight home and begged her to see me again---and I kissed her mama's ass until her mama allowed her to go back out with me."

My mom looked embarrassed, but blushed and it was sweet. I watched my Dad, kiss her hand as she smiled away, pink rising in her cheeks as he said:

"Yep. She smelled like fresh laundry."

© Copyright 2001 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2001-11-06 12:37 PM


My mother, though, was, and is, a woman of dignity, and said, "thank you," as she sat and pondered her dilemma. She was in a service man's bar--surrounded by women who tended such men. And there was her date--passed out--stone cold drunk and ugly--and she thought of her dimes within her purse, that she kept for emergency calls, but something in her made her sit taller, as she noticed the interest that she brought in with her. White pleated dress, cinched at the waste and a chaste scoop neckline, donned with mock pearls. She stood out in that wasteland of red-and-black dress and smoke and too-much-lipstick. So she sat, and contemplated her passed out date. She wondered what his face looked like.

It was a blind date--designed to annoy her mother, who found a blood relation to every boy she had ever brought home--saying "No, you can't date HIM. He's your eighth cousin on your father's mother's side..." So in desperation, she took the wild card. A blind date, with a Navy man from Texas. And there he was. Passed out. So she carefully crossed her straight-seamed stockinged legs and sipped her cherry coke.
============================================

"I smelled her, before I saw her," he said. He had that wonderful Texan drawl. "She smelled like laundry, fresh, hanging on the line, and it woke me straight up, because I thought of Mama."

"She reminded me of home and I woke up---hell--I didn't know--but I knew she was for real before I opened my eyes." He paused then, and I saw him tenderly touch her knee. "It was the luckiest day of my life. But I took one look at her and knew she wasn't proper there---so I took her straight home and begged her to see me again---and I kissed her mama's ass until her mama allowed her to go back out with me."

My mom looked embarrassed, but blushed and it was sweet. I watched my Dad, kiss her hand as she smiled away, pink rising in her cheeks as he said:

"Yep. She smelled like fresh laundry."
======================================

Gawwwwd I LOVE THIS........
the humor...the edge of sarcastic wit...
the detail of the images ... most of all the adoration of them for each other...and you for them......
very very cool write KA  

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

2 posted 2001-11-07 09:33 PM


Jan...thank you my loyal lovely friend---this needs much work, but hopefully it conveyed the love between them--and explains my mother's inconsolable sense of loss. I wept as I wrote and weep now...My mom told me once that heroes may be found in unlikely places...I will work on this one until it does them justice---I did not write this one--THEY did. Thank you lovie...your replies and your friendship means much to me.

Oh, and I came back to add, that my father and mother had an on-going argument for years about her wearing perfume...he despised it on her and she tried brand after brand, until finally, one day, he told her, "Now I LIKE that one!"

The name of the perfume? WHITE LINEN!  

[This message has been edited by serenity (edited 11-07-2001).]

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
3 posted 2002-01-05 03:27 AM


it does not need work...love it...helen
poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549
new orleans
4 posted 2002-01-22 05:10 PM


dear serenity,

this was an excellent story with a fantastic writer... all around wonderful... i'll keep a sharp eye out for more of your work (since i'm new to this forum and all)... thank you for the read and for sharing your pen with us...

sincerely,
jerome

Do not be deaf to me, for if you are silent I shall go down to the pit like the rest. (Psalm 28)

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2002-01-27 03:29 PM


serenity--I loved this!  It was like looking at the inside of a black and white photo...where the truth lies.  Candid, yet with obvious love, you tell the story and it is very touching.
vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
6 posted 2003-07-17 03:28 AM



Karen...I adore this peek into the life and love
of your mom and dad.  I felt as if I was sitting
there with them, listening to your dad tell the story,
and watching your mom blush.
This truly touched my heart.
Big hugs to you, lady...

And...I love the White Linen story.

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

Kielo
Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109

7 posted 2003-07-18 03:14 AM


My first - instant - thought when I saw your name under the prose section was "OOH! SERENITY PROSE!" lol.... I love your prose, and this is no exception.

Kielo

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

8 posted 2003-07-18 11:01 PM


wow. (I'm SO pleased ya got to meet the mom and dad...)

Wanted to say thanks, with hugs.


SharaRose
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~
9 posted 2003-07-19 01:42 PM


I read this, and got choked up. If this isn't the sweetest thing i've ever read I don't know what is. I just about boo-hooed on this one. Sweet as can be, and one of those things treasured to know what brought their love together. This was lovely reading.

SharaRose @-->--

Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer!

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Main Forums » Passions in Prose » Fresh Laundry

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary