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Dear Diary
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Dear Diary |
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Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania 
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April 2, 1992 I met Mike for the very first time today. I was at Julianna's house and he was there. I couldn't help but stare. I mean, I talked to him on the phone before, so I know him some but it didn't come close to actually meeting him. He was simply perfect. Love at first sight... May 7, 1992, Sorry I haven't written in so long. I've been spending tons of time with guess who? Yup, Mike. My parents don't like him. My dad keeps telling me, "Nothing good could ever come from a male with an earring. I know he's wrong. The earring is just Mike's way of expressing himself. I went to see him skate again today. He's amazing. He'll be mine soon enough. July 10, 1992 I know..I know another big gap. Today Julianna told me Mike was hinting around about asking me out. I sure hope so. I've been waiting so long. I'd wait forever for Mike. September 19, 1992 Some birthday all right. I had a bunch of friends over but Mike never showed. His excuse? He had 'stuff to do around the house'. I don't know what to think anymore. January 1, 1993 What a great way to start off the new year. They say whatever your doing when the clock strikes midnight is what you'll do throughout the new year. What was I doing you ask? I'll give ya a hint..not kissing Mike. This time he had to go to his grandparents'. So if the old saying's true I'll be doing a whole lot of crying this year. January 19, 1993 Today was amazing. Mike and I got into a snowball fight and just played all day. We had a snowday, NO SCHOOL! After all that he's put me through, I'm falling in love all over again. March 17, 1993 Still waiting for an answer... May 4, 1993 I really don't know what to think anymore. Mike's friends keep telling me all he does is talk about me but every time I try to confront him about it, he won't give me an answer. September 5, 1993 Sorry there was such a huge gap again. Mike and I were in a car accident back in May right after the last time I wrote. I broke my wrist and writing has just become to painful. November 9, 1993 Still no luck with Mike. He just keeps leading me on. I don't know why I even bother. I'm getting sick of my life. December 25, 1993 I hate Christmas. Everyone was so happy except me. I'm a burden to everyone and no one loves me. Especially Mike... February 14, 1994 Valentine's Day is the most pathetic idea for a holiday. Everyone is so lovey~dovey. I absolutely hate it. I'm starting to fall into my own demise... May 19, 1994 Mike came over today while Beth was there. It was the first time Mike ever met Beth because she lives a couple miles away. I introduced them, and from the moment I did all they did was make out. I couldn't believe the nerve of Mike kissing my best friend in front of me. They're a happy couple now. June 5, 1994 My heart is nothing more than a black hole, empty dark and unable to love. A gaping void. I once had a heart beautiful, happy, and capable of loving. Mike simply couldn't let it be. I see no reason to live. I want to die August 16, 1994 I was just released from the psychiatric hospital in Rochester. My family put me there after I slit my wrists. The doctors said I'm cured, my only regret is that it didn't work. I only hate my family now. September 6, 1994 I've lost all of my friends. My family hates me. I'm a burden to all. I don't deserve to live with these people. I have gotten to the point where I have terrible mood swings. My mind goes into a stage where I just want to throw something. I want to hurt someone. When I finally where myself out I snap. I just sit and cry for hours and hours. I hate myself. October 24, 1994 What can I say? I don't want to live anymore. You, dear diary, are my only solice, my only release. At least I have you. November 2, 1994 I met a girl named Aria today. She's like me. She gets the headaches, the want to throw something and the crying. It makes me feel better. January 16, 1995 I love Aria. She lets me know I am not alone. Yet I feel that way. I still cry myself to sleep and have now broken most everything in my house. My parents are tolerating me. March 13, 1995 Aria introduced me to Tom today. Tom is a really nice guy and she thinks he likes me. I hope not. April 16, 1995 Tom has made it a routine to call me every single night. I tell him it's just to keep me from killing myself, he says it's because he wants to hear my voice. It does give me something to look forward to. I wrote down the best part of tonight's convo. T: So do you love me? S: What are you talking about? T: Come on. We've been talking for almost a month now, Sara. How do you feel about me? S: Tom, come on. I told you this wasn't fair. T: Fair? You want to talk about fair? What about me actually having feelings for you and you not caring in the least? S: Tom, you know that isn't true. But you're a guy. You'll hurt me. T: Sara, listen to me, I'm not Mike. He was an idiot. He didn't realize what he had in you. I will never hurt you. You mean everything to me. I love you. S: Tom! T: No, stop. What do you feel for me? S: I don't know. I like you, I think. T: Then you have to trust me. Will you take the first step and be my girlfriend. We'll work on this together. S: All right. May 4, 1995 Things with Tom are going all right. I still can't believe I have a boyfriend. July 8, 1995 Tom surprised me with a dozen roses today because of my outstanding speech that one me first prize in the leadership contest today. I have to go get ready...we're going to eat tonight. Endnote: Things with Tom get better each day. It's been seven years since I met him for the first time. He is incredible and most of all he loves me for me. He would never do anything to hurt me like Mike did. I'm so glad I got through all of this. Dear Diary, I have Tom now and so I think I will close you for the last time. You were the best friend I ever had. ~Susie ~*~Born to Blossom and Bloom to Perish~*~ |
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| © Copyright 2001 Susan Acacio - All Rights Reserved | |||
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obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
This is very well played out! I've dabbled in journal fiction as well, but this turned out really nicely. You have a lot of character here that could be developed into at least a short story if you wanted to mess around with form. Keep sharing, please! "so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost |
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Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania |
obscurity of clouds, Thanks. I was toying with the idea of turning it into a short story. Glad you enjoyed. ~Susie ~*~Born to Blossom and Bloom to Perish~*~ |
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Sharon Member
since 2001-06-04
Posts 53Within a whisper |
I like this..it's straight forward and simple. I'd like to see what you could do with it as prose. |
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Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania |
Sharon, I'm glad you enjoyed. Prose, huh? What a challenge! I'm up for it though. I will repost soon. ~Susie ~*~Born to Blossom and Bloom to Perish~*~ |
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Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania |
Sorry guess I got too excited =). ~Susie ~*~Born to Blossom and Bloom to Perish~*~ [This message has been edited by Angel (edited 06-04-2001).] |
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