What do I need to do to restore my membership here?

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doreen_peri

Unregistered

Member
Posts 180

0 posted 2006-06-24 05:36 PM

?

doreen_peri

Unregistered

Member
Posts 180

1 posted 2006-06-24 05:48 PM

Well if you say I'm gonna need to get rid of somebody first, that's not going to work.

He already told me, "If you leave me, I'm going with you."

To which I replied, "Oh yeah? Well if you die on me, I'll kill ya!"

But seriously, it sorta feels uncomfortable being stuck in the corner over here posting on the discussion boards when I have some poetry to share. I posted a piece of poetry last night but somebody deleted it. I guess 'cause it wasn't a discussion... even though people are welcome to discuss my poetry all they want.

Would be cool to be able to post my poetry in the forums designated for poetry, though.

But hey, not trying to be pushy or anything. If I'm welcome here as a member again, cool. If not? Well, I'll just go away and post on my own site and Arcanum Cafe and a couple of other spots maybe.

Let me know, OK?

Thank you!

Ron

Administrator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-05-19

Posts 8669
Michigan, US

2 posted 2006-06-24 09:34 PM

Doreen, I just went back and read all the letters you and Clay emailed me between December 7, 2002 and August 21, 2003, including the legal threats. Thank you, but no, I don't want to get on that horse again. It's not personal, by any means, and my invitation to participate in Karen's thread should prove I harbor no animosity, but frankly I just don't have time to repeat old mistakes. It's much more exciting to make new ones.

I sincerely wish you only the best.

doreen_peri

Unregistered

Member
Posts 180

3 posted 2006-06-24 10:14 PM

Well, Ron, the letters I sent you were full of humor.

Lots of jokes amid the requests to let me have access to my own work for just a few days so I could copy my own work, much of which I had written spontaneously and not saved, unfortunately. Live and learn. I know life on the internet better now. Nothing is permanent here. Similar to real life in that respect, I guess. People die. People leave. It's over when it's over.

Because you repeatedly ignored my requests for access to my own work, I started cracking jokes and invited you to my forums because you had ousted me from here and I thought it was funny when I signed the thing, "cc, my attorney." It was a joke! Do you think I really had an attorney? Do you think there's ANY law anywhere which forces a websmaster to keep anybody's posts? Of course not!

I spent 5 years of my life here. Or 4 and a half anyway. I helped you build your forums.

My participation here was all for the sake of sharing my artistry and supporting the artistry of others. I was a devoted community member.

You tossed me out like an old shoe and refused to answer my emails. KIND emails where I asked for some time to retrieve my own work. I got angry. I'm human. I can't apologize for being human. I can't help it. I'm sorry you didn't understand my humor.

I truly thought you were my friend. No kidding! lol... If you didn't like my boyfriend, well fine. Lots of people don't like lots of other people. That's how life works. But you treated me like a piece of trash when I had given my time and energy to help you build this place up and I was offended. Why? Because I chose a boyfriend you didn't like?

Anyway, that's what I do when I get offended. I laugh. I make jokes. It's the only way I can deal with it. Laughter is the best medicine. An old adage. Why? Old adages become old adages because they are so true.

Your invitation for me to participate in the thread about Karen's situation when she was being effected by Katrina was kind. Thank you. But soon after that, you deleted my posts and wouldn't let me participate at all! I don't know why. I really don't. And frankly, I don't want to get on that merry-go-round either.

You're a better person than me, I guess. I harbor resentments. You hurt my feelings.

One day I'll get over it, I'm sure. After all, it's just the internet.

My son said to me 2 days ago when he was here helping me upgrade my forums software to keep out the darn spam bots... "Mom, it's just the internet! It isn't a 'community' as you call it. If people don't go to your place, they'll go somewhere else."

Thing is, I THINK of these sites as communities. I have a lot of friends on this site. At least I used to. Maybe because I got ousted by you, many don't consider me a friend any more. I have no idea. It's like "The Scarlet Letter." As soon as a society takes a person and brands that person as an outcast, the entire society starts to believe it.

Anyway, Ron, you take care of yourself and please know that you are welcome to come and post on Studio Eight any time!

Here's the link http://studioeight.tv/phpbb

And if you would like to retrieve any of your work, there is a search applet there which can help with that and if your work has disappeared? Hell, call your attorney.

Love,
Doreen Peri

cc: my attorney

lol... I crack myself up

Hey, Ron, if I don't laugh, I can't survive in this world.

If you're in the DC area in July, stop by the Capital Fringe Festival and meet me at the Cabaradio. I'll buy ya a drink. After the show? Let's go dancing, wanna?

doreen_peri

Unregistered

Member
Posts 180

4 posted 2006-06-25 12:09 PM

I just have one more comment.

I find it very odd that you would keep copies of emails but not answer ONE of them.

Had you answered me instead of ignoring me, I wouldn't have written you to ask you the same question so many times which was arequest to have access to the site so I can copy my work. To stop my requests, all you had to do is say, "NO." But instead you ignored me. Yet you saved the emails? Bizarre.

There was absolutely no reason you couldn't allow me access to this site to copy my work. Instead, you deleted all of my posts.

My friend had a different IP# at the time. You didn't have to block mine from my work location just because you didn't like him and didn't want him posting here.

If I had an edit button as a non-member, I'd rename this thread "Airing my dirty laundry." lol

I know it stinks and it's very unclassy of me but hell, gotta clean the dirt out some time, and air it out.

Peace and Love.

Over and out.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

5 posted 2006-06-25 07:37 PM

sigh...I had a thread??? and invitations were sent out???

Sheesh.

I need to be tested for "Al's Hammer" as my mother in law calls it.

But Ronnie Baby? I love you. Dor? There ain't no letter in the alphabet to file you under, scarlet red, or otherwise. So yes ma'am, I love you too.

and funny thing, I can see both of your points...

But it is true, as I learned first from my husband, and then from my children, as well as countless incidents here in the forum:

People would generally prefer to be in trouble than ignored.

Love to you both.

doreen_peri

Unregistered

Member
Posts 180

6 posted 2006-06-25 09:03 PM

sereneOne -

I knew my membership wouldn't be reinstated. Just felt like venting in public. Why? Because I had something to say that I felt I wanted to say in public.

I'd much rather be ignored than to be in trouble. I don't go for trouble. Never did. It's way too much trouble to be in trouble. When you're a child, you can get in trouble with your parents or your teachers. Some idiot adults get in trouble with the law or with their employers. I don't like any of that. I'm all grown up and even when I was younger, I never enjoyed trouble.

And "getting in trouble" on an internet website is ridicluous.

Being ignored and dismissed is not exactly my cuppa tea, though, and so finally now that I can post here even as a non-member (non-person???LOL!), I felt like speaking out about how my emails were ignore (especially after Ron mentioned he had saved my emails)! The only emails I save are emails for current work projects. Who's got time for that and what would be the purpose? Geesh.

I stopped being upset about how I was treated at this site by the management years ago. But I'm old enough and wise enough to publish the history of it and speak out when I have the opportunity. Yeah, I guess I'm just outspoken when I feel I've been wronged.

Maybe I'm different than some people. I accept people for who they are and I don't make judgements about them. Once I make friends, I keep them. It's important to me.

There are literally thousands of internet sites to post my poetry on.

Bottom line is, this is Ron's site, not mine, and he's welcome to accept or oust any person he wants to, including me. I just felt like stating that I felt I was treated unfairly in public. *shrug* It was something I needed to do.

And another great truth is that my hurt feelings are my own problem.

If I feel like I've been treated rudely and without respect, it's on me. Nobody else.

But I guess I've gotten to the age where I will tell people when I feel like they treat me rudely and without respect.

Then, they can take that information and use it later in their lives, maybe, when they treat other people rudely and disrespectfully.

That's all I have to say. I'll be on my way now.

And I love you, too! Thank you!

Essorant
Member Elite

since 2002-08-10

Posts 4769
Regina, Saskatchewan; Canada

7 posted 2006-07-02 02:48 AM

It sounds like you both did some wrong to each other. Isn't it time to do right and forgive?

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

8 posted 2006-07-02 01:06 PM

Sorry, but the whole story is not here. How can anyone know the facts if they aren't here? I don't think it was a matter of someone 'not liking' your boyfriend Doreen. There were other issues involved regarding inappropriate posts.

doreen_peri

Unregistered

Member
Posts 180

9 posted 2006-07-02 05:58 PM

If I remember correctly, my "boyfriend" was the one who had "inappropriate" posts. Not me. We just happen to share an IP#. Oh well.

Whatever.

Even if I were guilty of "inappropriate" posts, which I really don't remember happening at all, but if you say so, Sharon, let's just say that's the way it was....

Why in the world would all my posts get deleted by the webmaster? It was like a spiteful thing or something. Really ridiculous. I asked to have access to them and in response? He deleted all my posts. 4 years of work.

But it's over. Just felt like speaking my peace.

And yeah, Essorant, I would think it would be time to forgive and forget but I guess not. I can forgive but nobody's offered an apology.

Here's my formal apology to piptalk.com...

If I did anything, said anything, typed anything, out of line, I am sincerely sorry. All I meant to do was to share my poetry and my heart.

Peace & love.

-d

Essorant
Member Elite

since 2002-08-10

Posts 4769
Regina, Saskatchewan; Canada

10 posted 2006-07-02 10:14 PM

Is there no way that Doreen may be given a chance to prove herself at the forums again? It sounds like she did her time away from the forums, and that she is sincere about being a part of Passions again. Doesn't she deserve at least a chance?

Ron

Administrator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-05-19

Posts 8669
Michigan, US

11 posted 2006-07-03 02:01 AM

No, Doreen, you didn't ask to have access to your work. You demanded access under threat of legal action.

Your argument was that I had no right to forbid you access to what you previously chose to put in my home, therefore you should be given free reign within my home. Apparently you didn't consider the alternative. Your argument, baseless though it was anyway, went out the window completely when I swept everything of yours out the back door. I didn't delete your posts out of spite. I deleted them so you'd shut up and leave me alone. Guess what? It actually worked until I foolishly succumbed to a moment of weakness and suggested you post in Karen's thread as a guest of the forums.

So what immediately happens next?

Your boyfriend, apparently thinking my invitation included him, jumps in and tries to make himself at home. Nope, ain't going to happen. Why not? Well, to use Clay's own words, "Being as I am an inveterate troublemaker I most likely shouldn't have tried to invade your little tea party. ... I shouldn't have been there in the first place because my material hardly fits the general mood and ambience of your site." I could quote other passages from his emails to me, but the software filters would just throw a tizzy fit over much of his language.

I closed all our forums to guests for most of a month after his post, and considered that the cost incurred for making a mistake. I should have known better.

You were banned, Doreen -- after being warned -- because you couldn't or wouldn't take responsibility for what was being posted on your computer. I didn't hold that against you then and I don't hold it against you now. Personally, I think it's unfair you should ever be asked to choose between this community and someone you clearly hold dear. Clay put you in that position, though, not I.

Your ban will continue, however, not because of Clay, but because of Doreen.

Instead of accepting responsibility, you turned to incredibly transparent attempts at manipulation, justifications, excuses, blatant lies, and finally threats. Losing your rights to post here should have come as no surprise. I personally told you that if Clay wouldn't respect his own ban I would have no choice but to block the computer he was using, and that would mean blocking you, too. Had you accepted the block, it would have gone no further. Instead, you chose to ignore that and tried to circumvent the ban with aliases and different IP addresses. Only then did you lose complete access to the forums and could no longer even read here. You got all huffy at that point, apparently realizing that using my hard disk to store your poetry probably wasn't such a wise idea. Of course, had you left it at that, your poetry would have still been waiting for you years later, long after the ban on your IP addresses had been removed. Nope. You nagged, cajoled, and threatened, and even after all your threads were removed from the forums, you continued to whine, insisting your work at the main site and even all of your replies to others should be deleted.

Of course, all of that was Ron's fault. Doreen never accepted responsibility for her own actions, choosing instead, even today, to revise history and resort to justifications and excuses.

Right. Now ask me again why I don't want to do that all over again? On second thought, please don't. I've already, once again, wasted far more of my time on this than it warrants.

I honestly regret, Doreen, that you couldn't accept the kindness that was offered to you without feeling the need to demand ever more. There are a lot of people still here who care about you, rightfully so, I think, and for their benefit I've kept my mouth politely shut in hopes you could, like the guest you are, be equally polite.

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