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Critical Analysis #1

if I feel you

jstevens
Junior Member

since 1999-12-29

Posts 11
austin,texas

0 posted 1999-12-29 03:34 PM

saturate my mind with your sweet,blissful kisses
and frolic on the playground of my lips
like children that bathe in the innocense we have lost.
share with me your mind,heart and soul
and I shall promise you pastures of unearthly pleasures, bright and clear
like your eyes in the twilight of our love.

[This message has been edited by jstevens (edited 12-29-1999).]

jstevens
Junior Member

since 1999-12-29

Posts 11
austin,texas

1 posted 1999-12-29 04:22 PM

hey everyone...thanks for the critique!
perhaps, once again, no news is good news...so it goes.

Songbird
Member Elite

since 1999-12-15

Posts 2184
Missouri

2 posted 1999-12-29 06:12 PM

Hey, you got to give us time to read them, just found this one today. I like it. It is one I can understand and enjoy a nice one to give to your lady friend. Lucky girl!

devina
Member Elite

since 1999-10-28

Posts 3539
Cali

3 posted 1999-12-29 06:19 PM

I think this poem goes deeper than just the words...You must be quite the romantic!!!

Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...

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