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Critical Analysis #1

At The Full Moon Tonight!

YeshuJah Malikk
Member

since 2000-06-29

Posts 263

0 posted 2000-10-19 08:11 PM

The goodness of evil is my cover I swear!
Son of Sam, Son of the morning,
God of Manson I am here
casting spells in wishing wells,
Fantas-ma-gory is my name!

Swap your garments out for sackcloth,
turn your ashes into hay, I preach the gospel
of the mystics torn from chapters of today,
in incantations of mere mind states
that I dare you not to name.

I bring you dragons trapped in dungeons,
walks on water with these demons.
I command Terrapins and Seraphims,
even an intern some call bedlam.

I could call up Jesus Christ,
Vishnu, Allah, Buddha's wife!

Check it out!

A spider,
a wicker,
a burnt piece of hair;
A toad's heart,
a goat's horn,
toss them in midair!

Now puff on the chalice of visions not seen.

At the full moon tonight,
you shall know what it means!

At the full moon tonight,
at the full moon tonight,
at the full moon, the full moon,
the full moon tonight,
at the full moon tonight,
at the full moon tonight,
at the full moon, the full moon,
give me all your dreams!

[This message has been edited by YeshuJah Malikk (edited 10-20-2000).]

Brad
Member Ascendant

since 1999-08-20

Posts 5705
Jejudo, South Korea

1 posted 2000-10-20 05:18 PM

You've got some really nice lines here but the ending, which I'm assuming is a chant, makes it seem like a song to me. I find myself torn here. On the one hand, I like the light style; on the other, something, I'm not sure what yet, doesn't seem to quite 'gel' yet. Sorry, I can't be more specific as of yet.

Maybe drop the 'I's?

I thought this line was great though:

I command Terrapins and Seraphims

I gotta good laugh on that one.

Happy Holloween,
Brad

YeshuJah Malikk
Member

since 2000-06-29

Posts 263

2 posted 2000-10-20 05:24 PM

Thanks Brad, be on the look out for Fantasmagori. He'll show up when the moonis full.

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