Open Poetry #50 |
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Warrior Mice |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
The Warrior Mice The orange and gold of the dark desert floor did fade with the plummet of the Sun -and the red heat ebbed in the twilight -while the blue stars twinkled in the nightlight. -When the brown sand shifted in the moonlight, two mice did run, run, run thru a deep, deep gully of an upslant hill over sand in the night sublime. -Their hearts beat faster in the lost light -from impending disaster of a fright night -by the claws of an Owl now in mid-flight as its wings sliced the air from behind. But as Warrior Mice hunting on the hot desert sand and designed for evasive speeds, -they flickered thru shadows of the night time, -criss-crossed the black road’s white line, -confused the Owl’s sight line bringing food for their young ‘uns needs. And the orange and gold of the bright desert floor were the paints of the dawn’s display -as the mice peeked once at the daylight -thru the sweltering heat that was airtight -while the sand grew hot in the sunlight and the Owl waited close of the day. Soon, sunset light poured colors into night dimming day into indigo and black; -on the sounds and the silences of evening, -on the shadows of the forest life teeming -where the Dusk of the night stays sleeping with a dream of the Dawn coming back. Then the orange and gold of the dark desert floor disappeared with the plummet of the Sun -and the red heat ebbed in the twilight -while the blue stars twinkled in the nightlight. -When the brown sand shifted in the moonlight two mice did run, run, run. Namyh |
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Bluesy Socrateaser Member Elite
since 2002-11-07
Posts 2417In The Mirror |
Cute story Namyh. You have to function well in your environment if you're going to cut it. Your "Warrior Mice" are pretty 'street-smart' for a couple of desert 'rats'. Really liked these lines: quote: BTS ...just bein' Bluesy |
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jjote Senior Member
since 2002-12-25
Posts 1088Ontario, Canada |
I'm not familiar with this unique style, Namyh, but regardless, the consistency of the 3rd, 4th, 5th lines form, creates an appeal for me, like the refrain of a song or a serenade in the night. Enjoyed. |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
BluesyS - To function well where you are, always bring your 'street smarts' and your 'gut sense' with you and then you may just survive in the desert. It'll make a Warrior out of you every time. Thanks for really liking those phrases and for stopping in to enjoy BluesyS. Namyh |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
Jjote - I got stuck in several places when writing this. I could have sworn I heard a voice say "Use the Force Namyh. Use the Force" which I did. This created work was the resulting song and serenade. Hope it put a smile on ya. Namyh |
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