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Open Poetry #50
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The Dark Side Of Me
| Open Poetry #50 |
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The Dark Side Of Me |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States 
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The Dark Side of Me By Paul Wilson I keep my demons in check most of the time When I least expect it they come out to play How I wish I could send them to hell To be rid of them forever and a day My body screams in agony just thinking How easy it would be to give into them To run away and hide would be the easy way out To become my evil twin…to become one of them Every waking hour is the worst time for me My mind relives all the bad things I’ve done Closing my eyes sleeping till they call again Demons consume my mind as it becomes un-done I pray for peace that they would leave me alone The pain inside my brain is driving me insane Each day it starts all over again Each night they find a way inside my brain Every waking hour a life time of hell for me Fighting the demons…trying to keep them at bay Never willing to succumb to their needs Fighting with all my strength every day A stranger I’ve become to my family They look at me but don’t see The monster living inside of me I can’t see why the hell they love me To take the plunge into the abyss To lose touch with reality To burn the bridge that once connected us To escape this demon inside of me I must be strong and not give into demons in my mind Have faith in my God that he will see me through Fight with all my might that he will make everything right So I can become the person that you once knew Copy Righted 8-9-2020 ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ Paul [This message has been edited by Paul Wilson (08-09-2020 05:13 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2020 Paul D. Wilson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Paul, If you are speaking from life, then you are trying to carry too much pain alone. Anytime "pulling the trigger" sounds like a solution, it is time to ask for help. No shame in it. Stuff happens, chemicals change, it is not your fault, no matter what mistakes you may have made. Suicide doesn't end your pain,it passes it on to you family. That would be your fault. Reach out now! I promise you that you do not have to suffer, there is help. God bless your hurting heart and guide you to peace. Been where you are at, hang on and breathe. ~L |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Lori...Just so you know I changed that stanza to a more pleasant one. Never meant to imply suicidal thoughts Thank you for caring and for being a true friend...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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Starmcneil 1955 Member Posts 174 Alberta, Canada |
The stronger your faith in God the more the Dark one wants you...keep strong and God will give you strength...my prayers are with you and please remember even though we never forget the things we have done wrong and it seems we cannot forgive ourselves God does forgive and forget...He will carry you through...love the strength in your words and your desire to serve God |
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augustsky Senior Member Posts 828 midwest US |
I don't know if this is fiction or non-fiction, but may your spirit be lifted Dear Poet. Appreciate you.. Sky~ Sometimes..Miracles are just good people |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Sky...Thank you for reading, replying and caring. This is fiction on my part, but I have someone near and dear to me that is going through a bad time...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Karen...Thank you for all of your positive words. This is in fact fiction, it doesn't apply to me at all, but someone near and dear too me is going thru a bad time right now and I pray that all will turn out okay for him. Thanks for caring...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Paul, this is extremely dark. You are walking a road that I am quite familiar with here, and frankly it’s scary. I begin to understand people’s concern for my wellbeing when I go this dark. I am not sure what your original ending was like but I am glad to see you bring God into the picture, through Him you can be the man you once were if you wish to be, but also through Him, I believe you can be so much more. I say this merely because He has filled so many of what I thought were unfillable holes within myself. Let God do your fighting for you, my friend, while you nurture yourself back to health in His word. We both know those demons are real, do not entertain them. Michael |
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