Jan 2
Been a long haul,
8 days in the shadows of Moehau.
Searching for Archies.
8 nights on hands and knees
moist mud
rocks and leaves,
hard on knees.
Got the photos of Archies Frog,
cross one off
the bucket list.
Heading out tomorrow
3 days before Ranger hits alert
on daily check of vehicle.

Jan 3
Breaking camp at dawn
2 plus day tramp ahead.
Day sweats coughing,
shadows getting longer
short of target.
Sling hammock and shelter
take on snack bar,
night sweats coughing.

Jan 4
Leaking out of hammock
wet as if rain, sweating.
Snack bar, coffee,
the bars all that’s left,
hung on 2 days long
searching.
Wouldn’t allow failure.
Moving, sweating, coughing,
not bothered with hammock
tossed on ground
slept on top.
I think.

Jan 5
Dark, on feet
check location gps,
pretty good,
could be at vehicle
Port Charles Road
mid afternoon.
Day, sweats, coughing,
Vehicle still there,
lift the hatch
toss everything in,
brain generates image
of home cooked meal
nausea sets in
body margins thinning.
Head spins,
briefly alert
in the ambulance inn

Jan 6/7
Incarcerated
to house of healing,
hacking, wheezing,
drenched in sweat,
somewhere from the mist
a woman’s voice shouts
its not time yet,
So wet
could be in a pool,
voices ethereal, noise,
there’s movement,
peripheral left
more than one
they hold me down
what have I done.
Words unreal unravel
isolation
pneumonia
abscess in lung
the womans voice
loud its not time yet
induced coma
whiteout.

Jan 8/12
White noise

Jan 13
Voices again, indistinct
Hello, hello, is that you.
How is it Friday.

Jan 14/15
Black silence

Jan 16
It’s not time she screams.

Jan 17/19
Fog with shapes
drifting through.

Jan 20
Not quite awake
not unconscious.
voices, noise, fade in out.
Brain functions
forms words for lips
nothing out.

Jan 21/23
Why can they not hear me.

Jan 24
Hello Grandma
can I have a drink?
Take your fill my boy,
how skinny you have become,
once home you will soon pick up.

Jan 25
White, blank.

Jan 26
From a distance softly,
the woman speaks,
a gypsies love will carry him.

Jan 27/30
Surf breaks
on a distant shore.

Jan 31
What?
Hello, what the?
Voices,
shape shifters.
Open eyes, sit up,
cacophony of sound,
lay back close eyes.
Where, what day
morning night,
no word comes out.
Hand reaches out,
rising,
eyes open.
People, rushing working,
tape being peeled,
something slides from throat.
I don’t know any face.
Cool liquid to mouth,
hands work legs and arms,
life seems to evolve
somewhere.

Feb 1
Sleep of the dead.

Feb 2
Awake,
story unfolds.
They bring mirror
to enable shave,
who is that
gaunt apparition
18kg less,
No appetite.
It will come.
Everything hurts,
it will ease.
Doctor Nurses,
in continuous stream.
Dr with prognosis,
Pneumonia,
abscess in lung,
lungs scarred,
emphysema.
The road ahead
just shortened up,
guess I need learnwalk slower
to stretch it back out.

feb 3/mar 6
routine of recovery

Mar 7
Prologue
It’s a long road ahead, but it is there.
Medical staff to be thanked.
The body is repairing slowly.
To the gypsy woman
Whose love didn’t let go
Wherever you may be.
My Grandmother
Always there
Albeit passed long ago.
Plus the myriad
Of voices shapes
Past and present
Urging, surging,
holding me up
on the longest journey.
Thank you.