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icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

0 posted 2012-05-16 09:26 PM

Begging leave for precious violence,
you come to me in dreams bereft of charity
with little invitation and too much detail;
no doorway left for my denials
while my body compromises hard earned repairs
against a vision's crystal clarity,
I could count the lashes on your eyes
you could count the lashes on my soul;
would that I could choose in sleep
to slip into eternity's quiet endless peace,
but pain's fiery tongues flicking quick in dawn's soft mists
remind me to awake while my thoughts reach helplessly
as yet you dance in swift retreat
swirling into memory's shadows as they fade before the sun.

©2012 by icebox

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2012-05-16 09:36 PM

Ah, a chimera quick fang drawn response, and you have to be wary of the demon who will not allow denials, and it is isn't far to retreat, not giving the aggrieved purchase to state their case.

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

2 posted 2012-05-16 11:18 PM

Fine writing...James

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

3 posted 2012-05-20 04:12 AM

That damn dream just didn't allow you to be imperfect like the rest of the world.....smile....
Great writing! Choice selection of words to describe the situation.

Eric

Startime1955
Senior Member

since 2012-04-22

Posts 1072
Alberta, Canada

4 posted 2012-05-20 03:48 PM

A dream written in great detail with pain being the reality check...well done...*HUGS*

*may our dreams ever be magical*

MGROVES

Member Elite

since 2004-02-01

Posts 3802
california

5 posted 2012-05-20 07:30 PM

nice seeing you icebox. always words of wisdom

My spirit will rise
above the sea~
There will be no drowning
of my soul or me~

JL
Member Ascendant

since 2004-04-01

Posts 6128
Texas, USA

6 posted 2012-05-20 08:31 PM

Impressive write. icebox.
Enjoyed.

JL

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.
Maranatha!

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

7 posted 2012-05-21 08:36 AM

Breathtaking in its poetic intensity, dear Charlie.

Margherita

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