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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #46 » Sarah 5
Open Poetry #46
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ramisf
Member
since 2007-05-17
Posts 93
0 posted 2010-10-25 03:32 AM


Standing next to you or face to face

A smile of yours, sets me in my place

Raising my eyes to handle your grace

Acting like archangel’s warm embrace

Handsome Zodiac from outer space


Rami Fawwaz
© Copyright 2010 ramisf - All Rights Reserved
Brad Majors
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647
Georgia
1 posted 2010-10-26 06:12 PM

I like the thoughts in this but I feel you tried to hard to rhyme so some of the beauty was shaded by that
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
2 posted 2010-10-26 07:19 PM

Enjoyed...James
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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #46 » Sarah 5

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