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Open Poetry #46
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Broken Hearted Rag Doll
| Open Poetry #46 |
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Broken Hearted Rag Doll |
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Eldest Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177Alabama |
I found her on my way to the dumpster, a brokenhearted rag doll, just lying there. She was dirty and well-loved but I could tell she was heartbroken because she was discarded. Once she knew all her little girl's secrets, heard all the dreams she poured out. Once she absorbed all her tears and kept them to herself. Now she is alone, abandoned, lost. How did she get here, so far from home? Was she discarded, like the dreams she listened to? Was she stolen, like the innocence of her little girl? Was she lost, like all the secrets she kept? None of that mattered anymore, her heart was still broken. |
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| © Copyright 2010 Eldest - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Now this tells a story. That my lady, is poetry. |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
"A poet is....a person who deals with the truth as he sees it, who writes about those special moments in life which have given him excruciating pain or joy." Judith Minty I think this must be a moment that gave you pain.The doll is a great vector of your poetic voice. |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
there is a story inthe smallest things. good work latearrival |
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easy1 Senior Member
since 2010-05-22
Posts 1209Southeastern USA |
The words touching and poignant are overused, but here they are alive and vibrant in your poem. And what are we except beloved spots of color upon this earth, only like in ten-thousand or so more dimensions?  |
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Lamar Cole Member
since 2009-05-01
Posts 274 |
Very touching. |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
That is a very sad, touching story dear Lady but you really wrote it well. I loved it. A big hug for this one. Lindsay |
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Earl Brinkman Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183Osaka, Japan |
This is a lovely tale as mentioned. If I may mention, in Japan when children out grow their dolls and teddy bears the toys are brought to a temple to be burned. I guess one of the reasons why is that parents feel that this was an item that their children loved and for it to end up being discarded like the rag doll in your story would be unkind. Also animism is a stronger force over here. |
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Eldest Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177Alabama |
Thank you all for kind comments. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Eldest, The back story to why something is where it is or a person is doing what they are, is often the inspiration for poetry or novels. I think the importance we place on objects associated with children or our own memories can be very good fodder for the writer. I enjoyed this... and you leave the reader with a lot of questions which in some sense you point towards answers. I wonder.... how you would build the back story for the rag doll... on a seperate note, the metaphor of the rag doll with a broken heart fits well to someone who has been "discarded" by another or society...and the piece could be construed as a statement of the writers own loss or their observation of loss in ones they care about.. |
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Eldest Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177Alabama |
Thank you, Cpat, I will think about the "rest of the story" as Paul Harvey would say |
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