Open Poetry #47 |
Of Trains and Shattered Dreams |
Word Weaver Member
since 2011-03-06
Posts 437California, USA |
She leans into the damp, cloying wind, her breath a secret omission, her disillusioned eyes touching the gray sidewalk like silent tongues, numb to even the wet chill of the evening. Coat clutched at her slender throat wading through thin yellow streetlight, discarded cigarette packages, brown leaves that winter refused to wind away. Ruffled rooftop pigeons with unblinking stares watch the charade and the windows of shops shudder as imaginary footsteps in pursuit attempt to reach her, she feels her heart speed up then slow again. She rushes on then stops and stares into the window of their apartment beyond the twisted ivy slowly claiming the red brick, as he had wrapped tendrils of deception around their life. Then, she peers into the window of the apartment next door now seeing the white suddenly streaked through her chestnut hair, etched lines on her bruised face and her battered ribs protest as she exhales breath too long held. The shelter in one direction, the train to who knows where in the other. Fierce determination of never again flashes in her eyes as she hears footsteps gaining behind her . . . but he's not there. It’s her fear she hears haunting, day and night, ever haunting. With the haste of survival, adreniline coursing through her, she picks up her forgotten dreams anxious to answer the welcoming call of the train's whistle knowing she will board, seeking safety’s freedom in the unfamiliar anywhere. |
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© Copyright 2011 Marcia Miller-Twiford - All Rights Reserved | |||
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Ah, marcia, you make it look so easy. The smoothness of the lines, the way they land gently on the mind is a testament of how much effort went into the writing to make it so fluid. In other words.....you are GOOD! |
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Word Weaver Member
since 2011-03-06
Posts 437California, USA |
Thank you my friend I posted it at the wrong Forum but I'm still staggering around here. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
All you need do is contact a moderator and say "move me, please, to..." and let them know in which direction. |
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Word Weaver Member
since 2011-03-06
Posts 437California, USA |
Thank you Sunshine for the info. I just requested it be moved to Open Poetry #47. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice, nice, nice...James |
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Ron
Administrator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-05-19
Posts 8669Michigan, US |
It may have taken a while, but the poem has now been moved to Open ... |
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Word Weaver Member
since 2011-03-06
Posts 437California, USA |
Thank you very much Ron. |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
What a pure, unblemished tear-jerker, and I say that with the utmost respect. The world revolves around tear-jerkers, and this is one of the better ones. I agree with Balladeer with the way your lines are so easily accepted by the other ones and move the story to its ultimate wonderful ending. When you have been beaten into submission and you finally decide you must leave or die anywhere will do and you brought that home dynamically here. ~ I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time" / I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance ~ |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Totally captivating. You had me leaning in and grasping every word, intent on every image and feeling her anguish turn to determination. Streaks of gray be damned - jump on the train and get the hell out of there. I am cheering. A |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Me too. Ida |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Marcia, weaver of words, this tapestry is sensitive and exquisite, as always. Your needle knows the hearts and souls of all humanity. Owl |
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