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Supineness
| Open Poetry #45 |
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Supineness |
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Allogenes Junior Member
since 2008-01-16
Posts 35 |
How many days? How many shiftless nights Have passed in stark obscurity? They fall As pages from a mangled book (no law, No spine, to bind their soul from dizzied flights.) They whirl and eddy like a thousand sprites Up-caught in time's swift reaping. There I saw Monday, Tuesday, was lodged in Saturn's jaw -- The rest of life had caught his emerald sights. Oh what am I, dear brother, doing in here? I ask you friend because I do not know. Was it for Pride -- That love of self, old Pride - I left the world and man behind -- or fear? They say you can't escape from hell; not so. It's just that, no one's ever even tried. [This message has been edited by Allogenes (06-09-2009 02:33 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2009 Allogenes - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Bloodline Member
since 2009-05-23
Posts 236Oklahoma |
An absolute pleasure to read, smooth and mellow, as Petrachian sonnet should be, Bloodline |
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Allogenes Junior Member
since 2008-01-16
Posts 35 |
Thanks, Bloodline. Pleased to see I'm not the only one who believes this lovely form should be salvaged from its modern antiquarian-status. |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
there is so much in this one's depth...needs to go back up and be noticed...good write...very, very good |
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Allogenes Junior Member
since 2008-01-16
Posts 35 |
steavenr - Thank you. |
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Alison 
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Aside from the rhyme (which I am enjoying in yours and Bloodline's poetry) - I am wondering if part of hell is thinking that no one else has tried to escape. Maybe that's the futility of it all. A |
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playing.with.crayons Member
since 2006-01-02
Posts 362Neverland |
The way you weaved rhyme and meter in so effortlessly with the content is impressive. I'll be looking for more! lovely write. -Cheye |
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Allogenes Junior Member
since 2008-01-16
Posts 35 |
Alison : Yes, that ending 'couplet' is the very heart soul and purpose of the poem. I think the monstrous notion of hell (or purgatory) becomes thrice-grisly when the aspect of personal consent is considered. Perhaps there is taste of Eckhart in all that. Thanks for the comments. playing.with.crayons : Thank you. Don't hold your breath, though; I'm a tardy contributor. |
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