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Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2009-09-01 11:47 AM

I guess it was your voice water sound
that caused my metaphor to rise to mind
and catch that almost smiling side
of your attention to the unintentional

like glass and gauze I would imagine
that sound they make sliding within
and over the end of the other slowly
like swallowed whispering being set free

and I wondered which you would want to be
the see through nudity of a crystal vase
or the almost non-existent precautions
draped over some window of your soul seamless

and I would be either of the other after
finding ways to fit into the things we mentioned
and then spending time there alone but not lonely
just the hovering kind of time before falling

upward toward much more than just the wanting to

___________

daark (do of sand)

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2009-09-01 12:11 PM

"I guess it was your voice water sound
that caused my metaphor to rise to mind
and catch that almost smiling side
of your attention to the unintentional"

so completely awesome D!

enjoyed this one very much

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

2 posted 2009-09-01 12:15 PM

ms suesea...thanks babe!! you make me smile with your eyes.

zaaclindsay
Member

since 2009-08-12

Posts 111
Ottawa Ontario

3 posted 2009-09-02 03:31 AM

i have not read many poets who can weave imagery and highly intellectual metaphors that take on the guise of riddles for each reader to figure out for themselves as it applies to them. you are one of those. i am very intrigued by your writing as it is similar to mine. never thought that would happen. very stimulating to the grey matter on all fronts.

zaac

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

4 posted 2009-09-02 06:22 AM

Breathtaking, dear D.! You created a kind of refraction of light that made me see a wonderful scenery due to your magical poetic transparences ...

Love,
Margherita

ESHA SEN GUPTA
Member

since 2009-09-01

Posts 108
Maharashtra,India

5 posted 2009-09-02 06:31 AM

Reading poems like the present one brings in a humility within me the lines have been blende very well into each other .

liked it very much

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

6 posted 2009-09-02 07:36 AM

zaac..humble thanks amigo

_________

ms mar, thanks dear lady

____________

esha friend, thank you and welcome to the bluezoo

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

7 posted 2009-09-02 10:31 PM

and I wondered which you would want to be
the see through nudity of a crystal vase
or the almost non-existent precautions
draped over some window of your soul seamless

~*~

You make clay, priceless.

But you truly make eyes clearly.

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

8 posted 2009-09-02 10:46 PM

and I would be either of the other after
"finding ways to fit into the things we mentioned
and then spending time there alone but not lonely
just the hovering kind of time before falling

upward toward much more than just the wanting to"

now that's what i'm talkin' 'bout!!!

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

9 posted 2009-09-03 06:18 AM

ms sun, thanks lady friend
____________

ms slick...aw..don't tempt me baby!! thanks Helen

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