Open Poetry #45 |
Realigning my Sentence While Doing Time |
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Realigning my Sentence While Doing Time Diced tomatoes beginning to darken in the cauldron, their reduction by simmering heat bringing all good things to a thick paste – tomato bacon jam in bubble. I took some direction in the rising steam, pungent with sugar, onions, pepper and cilantro, spiked with garlic, my eyes watching something work to its fruition, my mind elsewhere. Isn’t this what I wanted? Every day for these last few years, while spending fanciful daydreams in brief breaks between “the real job” I wondered how I would fulfill if days were spread freely [like sweet jam] before me – not having to wake myself in the dark, nor making up a face that some eyes would never see, or spending dollar after penny on pantyhose and tight shoes or clothes that would be passé before their first wash. How might my mornings run, I wondered, would they be simple, comfortable, a choosing of life of mundane over forced employment. But the choice, when stripped from one is mentally brutal, emotionally devastating…but I shall rise, like steam over tomatoes, and most probably jam something into its proper place, as it should be. © KRJ 6 Aug 2009 |
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© Copyright 2009 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
D.Lester Young Senior Member
since 2001-12-08
Posts 1219Austin, Tx |
Sunshine your works are like a mixture of imagery gelling together in sweets, enjoyed this. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Sunshine - I understand your words in this writing, very strong, and emotional... BC |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
I know what you mean, Karilea. Even though I haven't lost a job, this summer has been so hard for me to get use to with school out. I enjoyed getting up and out every day and I have a hard time forcing myself to enjoy the "nothingness" of choosing what to do to keep myself busy enough to make time pass. M |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Diced tomatoes beginning to darken in the cauldron, their reduction by simmering heat bringing all good things to a thick paste – tomato bacon jam in bubble. You make me feel real hungry when I read about what you are cooking dear Sunshine, Bacon and tomato soup is my favourite. Great post, love. Lindsay |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Karilea, I am reading such good poetry tonight and this is among the best of the best. I hope that you are able to enjoy this time - now you can write even more and share even more and I'll be there reading every one. xoxoxo Alison |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
"But the choice, when stripped from one is mentally brutal, emotionally devastating…" ~ I'm sorry that that was foisted upon you, K, I truly am. I hope that you will be able to use this down time to relax and pamper yourself. ~ Do the things that you enjoy doing ~ and without time restaints. Knowing you, it shouldn't be long before you're back in the saddle again! It may be a different horse, but you'll be hitting happy trails again ~ to be sure! What a lovely writer, you are! ~ So warm, expressive, and down-to-earth. ~ Like good home-cooking! Love and a warm, understanding hug, Linda |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Keep your chin up. There's a bigger purpose in where you are right now... right here. Right here! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
You, dear Sissie, are a delight to any person's recipe book. Time has waited for you to have this time, to simmer. |
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Klassy Lassy Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187Oregon |
,,,a choosing of life Oh, yes! And I like the slow simmer here as all the flavors meld. The emotions bubble, but the magic rises from your words, and I feel your soul stretching to hear the song. The poem lays designs on my heart, too. Lovely work, wistfully poignant longings that catch at my heart. Karen |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
I definitely love your recepee, pains will disappear if they are cooked with fairness...This is quite a wonderful poem, I enjoyed very much. yann |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
Sunshine, An extraordinary beautiful poem you've written to mark the molecular movement of change. Here's to the opening of the next adventure of your life. It will come. I'm sure of it. Love you! cathy |
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martiniat8 Senior Member
since 2003-06-21
Posts 897Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic |
this is excellent, reminds me of my poem, "Love's Recipe" |
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Oklahoma Rose Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586Oklahoma USA |
For the time being Karilea my friend, enjoying your little vacation. Knowing you, it won't be long before you have something else. |
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XGarapanX Senior Member
since 2008-06-19
Posts 1435Antarctica |
Very creative wording. A beautiful piece of art. ·´~`·»Brett«·´~`· |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
I could be happy . . . simmering (but not in my own stew /!- ) Enjoyed this |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Creative indeed ~ I love this Sunshine. Very much enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
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Spiros Zafiris Senior Member
since 2002-10-20
Posts 982Canada |
..i'll say it again: always a thrill to read one of Sunshine's poems..ever so calming too.. spiros |
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brneyedgrly Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125nowhere and everywhere |
But the choice, when stripped from one is mentally brutal, emotionally devastating…but I shall rise, like steam over tomatoes, and most probably jam something into its proper place, as it should be. ___________________________ sunshine those last two lines were killer the whole poem wonderful shellie |
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luminosity Senior Member
since 2005-11-18
Posts 813 |
oh lady, do you cook up a tasty dish....can I come over for lunch? this comes across so clear, reading it is as if I am the one stirring... |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
A pleasure to read...as it should be...James |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
I read this with an opposite of sadness, but rather frolicked in the delight of images. You, my dear,are a WRITER. Now perhaps you will have time for a novel Liz |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
I absolutely love this, Karilea! The play on words is wonderful! It's full of great metaphors and the saucy spices of life-moments. (no bacon for me though, LOL) Think of this as an extended vacation, treasure each moment (think Sharon's carpe diem. |
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Didymus Junior Member
since 2008-05-01
Posts 33USA |
Years ago a mid-morning telephone call awakened me from a hours sleep and I began to learn that life - my working life - would never be the same. Days later I was delighted to learn I'd never again be joined at the hip to a telephone or a paycheck. That same delight was not shared by the woman I to whom I was married. Control so seemingly mine was never, in fact, mine. Life went on. Life changed forever. Keep that stove hot - your blank receipt card handy! The cook-in gets better! The rain will make your garden grow. Smiles to you Sun - Didymus |
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Lone_Wolf84 Junior Member
since 2009-05-26
Posts 21 |
To be honest, I do not have much sympathy..I mean it was a choice and with each choice comes a consequence. Sometimes that consequence brings laughter sometimes it brings tear. But the simple message is...if u don't like it change...u know? It may be hard due to the fact that you are struggling to end "babylon" and u aren't yet used to the idea of being a home wife(?) I say there is much more to it than just cook. I mean the poem u wrote sounds like it was written in haste while u were cooking and had nothing to do...that's talent. So instead of using it to think of depressing things, use it to invent. Taste that spaggethi sauce, experiment with the tastes, put chorizo in it and some peach in it and see how it tastes. A mundane world is a world with lack of imagination. |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
I have been retired for a few years now, Sunshine. At first I felt lost but new and different experiences filled the empty spaces. I enjoy my freedom every day now. Hope you will too. Ida |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms sun... it is easy for some to blow off the change...as if they really have a clue..jumping out of jail and into prison is one of the hardest steps one can take...the human side that is aware of the investment and the anguish of altarnatives...the romantic side that still looks out of the window at night and sees knights and ladies dancing.... you will find a way dear lady.. we all do...but I did sell my guns..(grin) |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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