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Dealing
| Dark Poetry #5 |
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Dealing |
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LaGraceLa Member
since 2011-01-30
Posts 243Minnesota, USA |
I never bite hard enough to make myself bleed, just sharp enough to keep the panic at bay, buy myself a bit more time to retreat someplace safe. My hand also quiets my pathetic whimpers, the sound muffled by the fleshy part of my thumb which I chomp down on, applying a steady supply of pain. But as soon as I've locked myself in the darkness of my room my jaws release the teeth-marked hands that are now shaking violently. All I can do is curl up and let it consume me, only holding on because I crave that empty, burned up feeling it leaves me with. Terror fills my entire mind, making me go blind as the sightless eyes cry out mascara filled tears. I would scream but fear strangles me, preventing me from uttering even the simplest sound. Control is never part of it. I lose say over my limbs, they lay dead and useless as my frantic mind runs desperately incircles, a vain attempt to find some means of escape. There is nothing I can do but wait it out, trying not to let the horrors break my mind too horribly. It will be minutes or hours before I can feel it subsiding. Only then will I attempt to catch my breath, which leaves my lungs in rasping chokes. Multicolored dots dance around my regaining sight, teasing me with their happiness. Then the anguish releases my body and the pain floods back, a torturous reminder of the Hell I must live in because of you. |
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