Open Poetry #43 |
It Could Have Been A Cleanup In Aisle Seven |
icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
Lord help me I've been drinking and I see no point in stopping now; I have never been civilized merely learned to be contained. I think I work too many days, endless train without human break and it makes me want to take a drink or three or six or ten, I just don't seem to know sometimes when a person should say when. One of the cats looks at me and says, ‘Meow." I'm not sure how she knows how I am so far over the line tonight, but if I touch her she will claw and bite unless I stumble out into deep mosquito night to cut her catnip from simple trails, the in between of garden bales, then when I do she stalls mid cry, falls over, half-lidded eyes just beg. I stopped on my way home tonight to buy some wine and cheese and bread, anything to slow my head, and I noticed something strange along the aisles; there inside the store too many smiles on faces of young women in their summer little clothes, maybe it was just the air but they all sure got perky there, right there when they saw me in the produce aisle, and fresh bread line and yogurt spread, and at the head of checkout stand; even crossing paths in hostile land at women only bays, each on breaks in separate ways hunting shortcut's end of days. I knew it wasn't air-conditioning but hardly in a mood to think I knew I had to leave and drink to let my thoughts distill until I could no more stand, until I no more thought I should reach out, give each a hand; terrible truth of awareness is touch, old skill in gender knowing, how to read need of other, yearning greed of want. ©2008 by icebox . |
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© Copyright 2008 icebox - All Rights Reserved | |||
XOx Uriah xOX Senior Member
since 2006-02-11
Posts 1403Virginia |
::smiles:: I seem to relate to this one lol I tend to go from Huang Po to Li Po sooooo easily. and...Ya gotta love the way that flowers and young girls smile when they see you approaching. Saving this one. Thank you for the gift. |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
"Lord help me I've been drinking and I see no point in stopping now; I have never been civilized merely learned to be contained. " Sometimes I really dislike taking parts of a poem and saying they're my favorite. These weren't, but I related to them the most. Loved every word... |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Your writing always touches a nerve. I am drawn to emotional clarity and attention to details as much as the characters that pass through the check out. Nice work, icebox~ |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
I enjoy poetry that makes me think. You certainly fill the bill there, Mr. Ice. Glad to see you writing again. Ida |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
nice read |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I've said it many times since, but the first time I even said it, I'd said it to my Dad. In an attempt to explain my proclivity for drink, I explained to him-- "It's like getting laid, emotionally..." then... "I forgot you were my Dad!" He just shook his head and said, "I guess I'll take that as a compliment." This was a fun romp of a read, Charly. I like to see you enjoying life...we all need a little break from pain on occasion. love you my friend--hope you enjoyed Lammas. |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
((((Charlie)))) What a great slice of life's reality. Nice to hear you love cats. They do know simply everything and can make you feel totally transparent. I will read your poem more than once, no doubt. It grips. Love, Margherita |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Great write, I liked reading your thoughts and Expressions about this subject in your poem! ARCTIC WIND |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Laughing here my friend...this was terrific...layed it out, then drownedededed it out! Really enjoyed reading.. jimmy |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
You tell a good story you know? I have enjoyed your work since you came here. "...buried way beneath the sheets |
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lucky Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601Idaho |
very nice charlie... dale |
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