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ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

0 posted 2008-09-09 11:06 AM

Mint

Winter fresh breeze after the rain has come,
When I am empty of sound this touch upon your hand
My touch upon your heart leaves its imprint in cool green
Soliloquy but a tool to soothe the saturated breath laden in branches
When my arms ache, outstretched to embrace you
Warmed and brighter in the smile of a warm sun, August done
As time trickles but for the pools in my upturned palms to drink

I have waited here, in anticipation as my dress and dawn
Not tethered but patient as autumn arrives around me softly
Days take on colors crisp and rosy glow a brocade jacket textured fine
Mint, the taste of enthusiasm blows along my tongue, auspicious sign
Open mouthed appreciation for sweet and supple ways, about me sways
The slightest chill throughout you will express
When words fall justly pale and all as pleased avail,
The senses left to trail in mint

Copyright Kkh 9/9/08

JenniferMaxwell

Member Elite

since 2006-09-14

Posts 2423

1 posted 2008-09-09 11:44 AM

Very refreshing, a lovely poem.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

2 posted 2008-09-09 04:31 PM

" have waited here, in anticipation as my dress and dawn
Not tethered but patient as autumn arrives around me softly
Days take on colors crisp and rosy glow a brocade jacket textured fine
Mint, the taste of enthusiasm blows along my tongue, auspicious sign
Open mouthed appreciation for sweet and supple ways, about me sways
The slightest chill throughout you will express
When words fall justly pale and all as pleased avail,
The senses left to trail in mint"

very lovely writing...we are feeling a touch of Autumn here today. I love the "brocade jacket textured fine".

M

WTBAKELAR

Senior Member

since 2008-09-09

Posts 1089
Utah, USA

3 posted 2008-09-09 04:54 PM

How Cool. Very insightful Fresh

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant

since 2006-11-07

Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !

4 posted 2008-09-09 05:37 PM

Wonderful lines and images here…such as:

“patient as autumn arrives around me softly”;

“Days take on colors crisp and rosy glow a brocade jacket textured fine”;

“senses left to trail in mint”

AND especially:

“Winter fresh breeze after the rain has come…
My touch upon your heart leaves its imprint in cool green”

Applause!

viking_metal
Senior Member

since 2007-02-02

Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.

5 posted 2008-09-09 11:48 PM

I think I actually tasted minty cool air for a second.

Holy crap.

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

6 posted 2008-09-10 02:28 PM

Lovely, fresh feel to this poem, Diamond.
Ida

TheAnonDavid
Member

since 2008-08-28

Posts 237
UK

7 posted 2008-09-10 02:46 PM

Some people describe the hot days of summer superbly; others paint a glorious picture of autumn, Here we have a beautiful presentation of the subtle and almost unnoticed way one becomes the other.
A remarkable poem indeed.

Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Dylan Thomas

Ericc
Member Elite

since 2003-01-31

Posts 4178

8 posted 2008-09-10 03:27 PM

Oh wow....!!!!

Love,
Eric

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

9 posted 2008-09-10 10:28 PM

Yo ThisDiamond,

While this is very light and cool in taste like mint, for me it seems to rather all run together. I’m afraid I am just not of a romantic nature. I’m sure the romanticists among us will love it.

Bobby

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