»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #42
»
Sounds of Nepal
| Open Poetry #42 |
|
Sounds of Nepal |
|
kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore 
|
the gravity-defiant bus croaks its way round mountainous bends. on its roof, boisterous boys soak in the rain's chills with an unified Hindi song. it spurs the toddlers to sprint like penguins to the hissing bus their school ties are caressed by the wind, a wistful paint of words they will learn later. questions come knocking on a foreigner's mind, to be squashed by silent chuckles as he dances in the adrenalin of seeing yet not knowing. [This message has been edited by kaile (06-28-2008 10:28 AM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2008 heng kaile - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Heng, I love what you do with words on this blue page canvas, and particular with this poem. I also love the way you presented it with a cinematographical technique. First with the camera on wide-angle lens, I could see and hear the bus dragging itself up the winding road. Then the camera honed in to the top of the bus and I could see and hear the boys braving the cold with their song. Then it moved to the children about to board the bus. (I must admit that the word, "toddlers" jarred a bit for me, as that made them sound far too young to be attending school.) Then . . . and I am still floating on those magnificent lines: a wistful paint of words they will learn later - a wistful paint of words is EXACTLY what I am experiencing in reading your poem, and I will continue to float on those lines for a while after I have pressed the Submit button. Then the camera moves to a close-up of the face of the foreigner and we hear his quaint questions with all the excellence of a French psychological movie (sorry, but I don't know any Singapore movies and the French movies - or most of them that I have seen - have always been for me, the epitome of cinematographical art) - and the camera artfully lets us - to use your phrase - "see and not see" - "the silent chuckles" and then the dénouement lines that really blowwwwwwwwwwwwww me away: as he dances in the adrenalin of seeing and not knowing. Bravo, Heng! And thank you for the poetic and the cinematographical and the geopraphical and most of all the human experiences! Are you back from the camp now - or are you just back for a day? - Owl |
||
|
2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
Hello Kaile, as a sometimes traveller I appreciate very much your poem, the words are precise and tonic, I can see the colored bus with all the people who use it....It is magnificent and I add it to my library.... thanks to you yann |
||
|
Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: Exquisite poem! (though you make me experience vertigo, as I suffer from a kind of bus-phobia, especially on mountainous bends ...). Love, Margherita  |
||
|
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
click..click..click precision imagery masterfully presented, and the irony of seeing without seeing  |
||
|
kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
Owl, thanks for putting so much thought into your reply. it was really gratifying. i love watching movies and i am glad that this cinematographical poem worked for you. as for the toddlers, actually i thought that they looked too young to attend school. hence, the word choice. would rethink that a little. thanks Hi yann, thanks for adding me into your library. am honoured. Margherita, to be honest, i was apprehensive of the dangers involved but well, my need for adventure preceded all. haha Kacy, precisely. and hopefully, someday, i will be able to understand more. not just the nepalese but other diverse cultures in the world |
||
|
Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Excellent write! Eric |
||
|
LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
A very thought provoking poem Kaile, it spurs the toddlers to sprint like penguins to the hissing bus What a picture that paints. Well written. Lindsay |
||
|
kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
Thanks Eric and Lindsay for your replies |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
