Open Poetry #42 |
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Family was second place |
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hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
this is just something that came to my head i dont know if its good i just wrote it... Moms at work Dads at work There child is at home all alone feeling abandoned and unloved love is needed for a healthy child its a proven fact without it you can die he tried to get there attention but they didnt see the love that he needs he sits there in front of there tv playing video games they dont know? or do they not care? he stays out of there way the things he looks at on his computer they dont know? or do they not care? he stays out of there way the things he says and does they dont know? or do they not care? he stays out of there way the things he smokes and drinks they dont know? or do they not care? he stays out of there way one day they might care that they were to blind to see all he did was for love that he never had but it didnt work what is left for him to do will he end up in jail or on a bathroom floor with pills every where all these things could have been prevented but they could never be away from they work family was second place |
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© Copyright 2008 JJ - All Rights Reserved | |||
Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Hiddensmiles, This is an interesting write. What is "love". How do you define it? Bobby |
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hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
a warm personal attachment or deep affection/when you care so much about a person that you tell them all the time/you worry every time they go somewhere/you would risk your life for them/or even just a hug...you were probly confused when i said you can die with out it. the reason i said that is because.. orphans in africa and other places die because they get no love or affection they end up hitting them selves and bitting them selves because they have nothing else to do...these kids also have grown less and unhealthy; some even die..or they are always unhappy |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Hiddensmiles, I suppose you don't consider working to provide food, a house, and a warm bed part of it? Bobby |
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hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
yes i do that is a good point |
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hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
But if the person you provide for are never told that you provide there needs, (through work) as an act of love(many just provide because they have to), and also this happens in familys where only one parents wage is needed to provide for there family. So if they would have a stay at home mom, thus providing more time at home, there children would get more attention and most likely be happier.But i understand that if they dont have the money they have to work alot of the time just to get by. But in this poem that is not the case. JJ [This message has been edited by hiddensmiles (03-18-2008 11:57 PM).] |
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hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
i probably should have added that in the poem because i can see why that maybe unclear |
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