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Jaime Fradera
Senior Member

since 2000-11-25

Posts 843
Where no tyranny is tolerable

0 posted 2008-01-19 08:18 PM

(Inspired by Thisdiamond) and her patchables.
It is not pain, and perhaps not quite longing.
A haunting somethingness that can't be articulated or defined,
not in a verbal way, yet it draws tears,
something that can only be felt, and heard and seen
not be told,
but only embodied in snow and whitened air.
The ancients recognized not just four elements, but five:
Earth,
water,
wind,
fire,
and snow.
Show much I feel,
so much I yearn, and hope, and long for ...
but cannot find the words to tell.
Watch my face.
See the changing panorama of my moods
that flicker there,
See with inner eyes
the roiling, throbbing, beating passions
of a heart and soul
that mirror there.
Know me
in a way that many won't have time to.
Please love me.
Let me know your feelings,
your moods, your fantasies, your world,
so that my world may also be your own---
and then the world will be ours!
And we will write songs
that no voices have yet shared!
But what do I know?

so many people want to fill the world with silly love songs ...
Paul Mc-cartney
Southern Cross

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant

since 2000-01-29

Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia

1 posted 2008-01-19 08:22 PM

Show much I feel,
so much I yearn, and hope, and long for ...
but cannot find the words to tell.
Watch my face.
See the changing panorama of my moods
that flicker there,
See with inner eyes
the roiling, throbbing, beating passions
of a heart and soul
that mirror there.
Know me
in a way that many won't have time to.
Please love me.

was the first line of this meant to be so or show?

James.. this is a very fine write.. well done! love RDB

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant

since 2006-11-07

Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !

2 posted 2008-01-19 08:22 PM

a very nice 'write!'

applause!

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2008-01-19 08:25 PM

VERY NICE! I especially liked this:
"Watch my face.
See the changing panorama of my moods
that flicker there"

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

4 posted 2008-01-19 09:31 PM

A very deep plunge into the heart of the man.
Well done Jaime.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

5 posted 2008-01-20 03:22 PM

Expressive words from your heart...James

TomMark
Member Elite

since 2007-07-27

Posts 2133
LA,CA

6 posted 2008-01-22 02:56 PM

beautiful.
Tom

aziza
Member Elite

since 2006-07-09

Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!

7 posted 2008-01-24 01:59 AM

I think this is the very best poem of yours that I have read. It's amazing, Jaime. You just seem to be letting us see inside you - and .. well, this is really good stuff.

Alison

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

8 posted 2008-01-31 06:06 PM

Beautiful Indeed!

ARCTIC WIND

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