Open Poetry #40 |
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Dance of The Lily |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA ![]() |
As a frog danced the lily I dreamed.. Caught breathless in sheek slumber, yearning the taste of sweetness From the vine that awaits me. For I crave thee, wishing for dreams That would carry me out from the Bowels of reality to the sleek softness Of shivering nakedness…. Soon…night shall embrace the eve of Whispering pines and crackling fires That warm the buds as hues climb The air into silence, falling unseen Toward earth, landing lightly upon The lily…now a prince….no longer A frog…. |
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© Copyright 2007 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved | |||
jody5 Senior Member
since 2005-12-21
Posts 876California, U.S.A. |
Bravo! That was one of the most enjoyable poems I have read all evening. Thank you for sharing your frog Hugs Kimberly |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
You still have it, a joy to read. You are not on these pages as often as you should be. martyjo |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
another fine Magnus piece ![]() what a scene! whispering pines and crackling fires! nicely done |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
the deepness of this is incredibly beautiful, which encompasses meaning.... brilliant |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Magnus I have to agree with Lee on this one. |
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Midnitesun![]()
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
quote: Beautiful imagery and thoughts. Well done, poet! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
First of all Mag--three big ole smooches-- ![]() and normally, I wouldn't dream of a critique with you, but something about that second verse, I dunno. Maybe it was the olde English "thee" followed by "bowels of reality" then the nude shivering, but it just gave me a really bad Shakespearian visual. *blink* (sorry, but I'm always honest with my buddies, and I know I'm setting myself up for poetic brutality from your fans, but folks, it's prolly just me, yanno? so be gentle) Otherwise I thought the poem was lovely--I read it with and without the middle, and I didn't think it needed that bridge. And I feel awful saying "hey" this way too. It's been so long since I've been active on the board and here I go burning your bridge. My bad, mag. You know I love ya tho, doncha? ![]() ![]() |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Wonderful write dear Barry! ![]() For it was not into my ear you whispered |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A love-ly fairytale, Sir Prince! To love & romance! Linda ![]() |
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Magnus![]() ![]()
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Serenity, don't worry, you haven't hurt my feelings...when you write no more often than I do, it doesn't make too much difference. Thanx for the read.... Thank all of you for the read. |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
"The air into silence, falling unseen Toward earth, landing lightly upon The lily…now a prince….no longer A frog…." I need this poem right now frog to prince... it's good to read you Barry you're missed |
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paullallady Member
since 2007-04-03
Posts 262Michigan |
what a lovely poem! I love the descriptiveness, for it touched me and helped me "feel" this poem. wonderful! |
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SEA![]() ![]()
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
"Soon…night shall embrace the eve of Whispering pines and crackling fires That warm the buds as hues climb The air into silence, falling unseen" LOVED that part!! ![]() |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Prince Magnus.......this is a treat! Good to read you again. ![]() |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Remove the hat, Poet, and bow to the applause of a new delight... the frog accepts the critic! |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
You have always had a way with wrapping sensuality around the stunning visions you paint for us to see...Very Well done, my friend...*Big Hugs* |
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