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Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

0 posted 2007-01-11 03:14 PM

Kachina

don’t be afraid
       I’m only a mask
   the docent said

                             baptized in bone ash
                                    clay paint

zigzag my
mirror twin holes
    of eyes

                             dead I am dead

unless they believed
         and they don’t
    even pretend

                              not even they

my
        children
smile contempt

                              only a mask
                                          a show

don’t then I say
          but fear me for
what I was

                              dancing to the flames
                                         real then

        they dance me
               terrorize me
how dare they

                              I grow thin
                                                  cannot hold

a pastel mockery
too sparse I scowl
    power

                              being real
                                   made me real then

their urban prance
horrors freezes me
and I can’t

                             would never
                                             dare to

take me off
anymore
even if I could

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2007-01-12 12:23 PM

Amazing, the spell man
can conjure from a doll.

Well done, m'friend.

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

2 posted 2007-01-12 01:11 PM

whew, intensly spiritual....loved the dance of the spirit ones....
incredibly good write

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

3 posted 2007-01-12 02:38 PM

RatMan~

"being real
made me real then"

I so enjoy reading you ... you know that, right ?

But then ... your thoughts are so real ... yes, real~
How refreshing to have you here, my friend~

*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~
Email - [email protected]

The Lady
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-12-26

Posts 7634
The Southwest

4 posted 2007-01-12 06:10 PM

wow!

power
well written

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

5 posted 2007-01-23 01:57 PM

Alone, your words would be powerful and haunting... With your format, they dance across the screen and straight to the heart. Magnificent! *S*

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

6 posted 2007-01-23 03:21 PM

The power has to believe in itself, doesn't it? But now the feral children rule the street.

Excellent, the structure, the feel, the truth in this one.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

7 posted 2007-01-23 06:13 PM

Well done poet Sir!!

In the midst of winter,
I found there lives within me..
An invincible summer.

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

8 posted 2007-01-26 04:16 PM

You have the power of a puppeteer to endlessly pull my strings and make me dance to your music.

a good commitee can decimate communication.

miscellanea
Member Elite

since 2004-06-24

Posts 4060
OH

9 posted 2007-01-26 07:42 PM

the 'firing' process, your description, the spaces you left for imagination... Brilliant writing, Ed. I always read your format several times, from top to bottom, right to left from the bottom, etc.
It is fascinating how it retains its power no matter from where I begin reading...

Much enjoyed!

miscellanea

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