One Moment In Your Day. - pipTalk Forums

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Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

0 posted 2008-12-27 04:55 AM

One Moment In Your Day.

On a day i really needed you
You failed to be there
When i needed you to talk to
It's as if you didn't care,

I needed your strong hands
To help me through the day
To sit and listen to my dreams
But you just walked away,

I only have a little time left
Just one moment in your day
To let you know "I miss you"
In every single way,

You know! if you ever pass my way
Needing me to be there for you
Just keep right on walking
I have better things to do,

Annie

Marc-Andre
Senior Member

since 2008-12-07

Posts 501

1 posted 2008-12-27 06:24 AM

I love your last stanza. It shows a beautiful character (narrator) development

Mark

Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

2 posted 2008-12-27 11:09 AM

Thank you Mark, that's lovely of you...

Joyce Johnson

Member Rara Avis

since 2001-03-10

Posts 9912
Washington State

3 posted 2008-12-27 08:50 PM

Yes Annie dear. You don't need to beg for attention. I liked the last strong line too. Love, Joyce

Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

4 posted 2008-12-28 07:11 AM

Thank you Joyce,
It's strange what you remember when writing...lol

Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

5 posted 2008-12-28 04:05 PM

Yep, Annie, no one needs to be a friend to one who is not a friend. Well said. Thank you for sharing and welcome to PiP.

Alison

Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

6 posted 2008-12-28 05:01 PM

Thank you Alison it's nice to be here

wanderingmonk
New Member

since 2009-01-05

Posts 7

7 posted 2009-01-05 10:42 PM

I didnt expect the poem to end that way, but when I got to the last stanza, I was really pleased. It made me happy for you, and glad that you know your strength

Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

8 posted 2009-01-06 07:01 AM

Thank you wanderingmonk

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

9 posted 2009-01-06 04:43 PM

Nicely done and I see your picture finally got loaded - right on! Welcome again, and I always enjoy reading your posts.

Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

10 posted 2009-01-06 08:50 PM

Thank you, Yes it finaly worked

nourzihane
Member

since 2008-07-10

Posts 254
Algeria

11 posted 2009-01-08 06:11 AM

Dear Annie

i'll stay here to see your beauty feelings
and your creativity
thank you so much my dear friend

love
Nourzuhane

Anniepimm
Senior Member

since 2008-12-26

Posts 550
England

12 posted 2009-01-08 04:05 PM

Thank you how nice of you

Hope Fleeting
Member

since 2009-02-23

Posts 52
Smalltown, Somewhere

13 posted 2009-02-25 12:32 PM

I recognize the feelings behind this! It's a sad, but true, fact of life that some people are all take, take, take and rarely want to give anything back. I'm glad to see you found your own inner strength.

Beautifully written

~ Previously Known as Broken_Winged_Angel and BrokenWinged_Angel~

I know when to bow my head in defeat and move on...

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